To the Edge of the Glowing Stars
by wibblywobblywhogirl
Summary: In a universe not her own, Evelyn Crenshaw's nightmare has come to pass. This Doctor has regenerated, and she must learn to accept a new man, and the fact that their lives will never be the same together. It's always been him and her, the two of them together. But in this foreign universe, she's not the only one tied to the Doctor's fate...
1. The Man Who Forgets

**A/N**

**HELLLOOOOO MY LOVELIES! AND HELLOOOOO NEW LOVELIES, I WOULD SUGGEST READING THE FIRST TWO STORIES BEFORE THIS ONE, YOU MIGHT BE CONFUSED IF YOU DON'T, FIRST IS THE GLOWING STARS AND NEXT IS ACROSS THE GLOWING STARS!**

**Anyhoo, well, I'm back, getting everything together, and an idea formed and such. This will be the last installment of Evy's story, so hold on to your hats, it's going to be a roller coaster if everything goes as planned. Which, let's be honest here, it probably won't.**

** This chapter was difficult to write, mostly because I'm having war-like flashbacks to when Ten regenerated in the show, and it's bringing up horrid feelings of sadness and furious denial haha poor Eleven, I'm going to be honest, I hated him for half his run just because he dared to exist.**

**But honestly, how can you hate that man for long? Sometimes I disagree with the way Moffat and his co-authors write the Doctor and his companions, but he's way too damn adorable to hate. I grew to love him just as much as any other Doctor (okay, maybe with the exception of Ten, I love Ten more than is healthy, and Twelve is well on his way...) because he's the Doctor, he always will be the Doctor, and he'll always need his companions to love him, no matter who he ends up as.**

**Which I think is the most beautiful part of the show, honestly. **

**ANYWAYS, glad to be back. Hopefully I'll have some time to write more often than I did the past few months of the semester, but I can't make any promises folks. It'll be just like ATGS, with me updating as I have time to write and as my muse allows, you all know how it is.**

**Hope you're all doing well and loving life, because you deserve nothing less. Each and every one of you is creative and imaginative and adventurous and I adore every single one of you, I can't even reiterate that enough :] Love me some Whovians.**

**Also I'm thinking of making a Tumblr page, just for DW stuff, as well as TGS stuff and such, idk. What do you guys think?**

**Lots of love,**

**-A**

* * *

><p>"Doctor, shouldn't we be-"<p>

"No, no no no, Evy, you're supposed to be saying 'marco'! Nice and loud," I hear echoing from down the corridors, and my eyes move towards his voice in the darkness under my silky blindfold, "MARCO! Like that! Come on, give it a go!"

"I know how to play Marco Polo, but don't you think-"

"Well you're rubbish at it."

"Don't you think we should see where we've landed?" I say, my voice sharp, taking his old tie off in an angry swipe.

I jump a bit when I find his face close to mine, brow furrowed. His voice had sounded so far away, yet he's less than a foot away from me.

"Landed? What are you going on about?"

I step back a bit, just enough so I can't feel his breath on my face, sweetened by the double fudge chocolate frosted brownie sundaes he had insisted we have for breakfast.

_It's like he's regenerated backwards through eleven lives to when he was five years old…_

"This morning, you… told me that we crashed yesterday after you fixed the T.A.R.D.I.S. You said she fell out of orbit when you regenerated, or something."

"Did I? Are you sure, I don't remember saying that… Don't you think I would remember if we had crashed?" He says, sweeping through a doorway into the console room, typing for a moment, and then pulling a screen around.

He stares at it as if it's just spit on his face.

"Spin me 'round and call me Shirley, we _have_ crashed!" He says, smiling widely, "Isn't that… thrilling!"

"Is the T.A.R.D.I.S going to be alright, though? She's been acting strange, is that why, because she's damaged?"

"Oh, no, she's going to be fine, she just sort of… hates you right now. Not to worry, she's not damaged, not too badly at least." He says, patting the console.

"Hates me? Why?" I pause, looking up at the ceiling, "Was that the nightgown fiasco? The sink explosion? The shower using sludge instead of water?"

He gives me an apologetic little smirk, adjusting his bowtie.

Such a peculiar outfit he's chosen. He looks like a professor I had in college once, an English teacher, I think. Not sure, though, could've been History.

_It was a long time ago._

"She's just confused. You're all wrong, your presence… upsets her, but she'll get over it! Until then, let's see what's outside those doors!" He says, rubbing his hands together and rounding the console.

This room is all wrong, too. It's all metal and shiny, clean cut shapes and colors. The console is more jumbled up, with so many buttons and levers and contraptions, I doubt I could even count them all correctly, let alone learn to use them. The rotor in the center isn't round anymore, it's a bulbous kind of blown-glass looking contraption. Nothing even looks familiar.

A sinking feeling drags my hearts down into my feet.

_It took me years to learn to fly the last T.A.R.D.I.S, and now… _

I follow him silently, peeking over his shoulder when he opens one of the doors. All I can see is something shiny green and metallic looking. Light glints off of it.

"Ha!"

"What, where are we?" I say, trying to get a better view.

"You might want to go put on some better shoes…" He murmurs, finally letting me past to look out.

"Better shoes?" I say, looking out over the flat expanse in front of me. It's much too colorful for my liking, honestly. The ground, that is.

There's that bright metallic green I'd glimpsed, and then a dark purple, and blinding pink, and canary yellow, all blotchy and out of place, all over the ground. It looks like rock to me, just… colored differently.

"Put on those glass-soled boots, you know, the ones we wore on Kwento, you'll need them." He says, grinning and bounding through the console room, into the wardrobe.

_The what?_

"Not sure I recall, sorry, did you say glass shoes? Who makes shoes out of glass, isn't that… stupid?" I say, following him, and I watch him bound up the spiral stairs, now shiny and metal like the rest of the T.A.R.D.I.S.

"Oh, come on, you remember, how could you forget? It was just last year, you had to walk across that lake of-" He stops talking, his feet stopping as well, looking down at me from the second level of the wardrobe with a frown that I can feel in my mind.

"That was her, not me." I say softly, feeling small all of the sudden. I cross my arms, my hands rubbing away the cold that's just rushed through me.

He watches me for a moment longer with that frown, as though I'm a stain on his precious new bowtie or something, before disappearing into one of the closets.

"Catch!" I hear, and I flounder to snatch the supposedly glass-soled boots that are careening towards me from the second-floor.

I stumble under the weight of them, and I know I'll have bruises on my arms tomorrow from the impact.

"You trying to kill me? Who throws glass shoes?" I huff, putting them down to have a proper look.

They're mostly made of normal boot-like material, what appears to be black leather, going up to a little less than halfway up my calf.

"Oh those puppies won't break, made with a very, very special kind of glass. That's why they're a bit heavy. The density is higher than the glass you think of when you think of… Well, glass." The Doctor says, clunking down the metal stairs with his own pair of boots already on.

I start unlacing the boots, slipping out of the flats I found in my personal section of the wardrobe.

_Well… Her section, mine, hers, ours. _

I slip my foot inside just as the Doctor reaches the first level, and he stomps his way to me, lifting his legs a bit ridiculously as he walks.

_They don't look particularly easy to walk in… _

"They're not! But I don't know about you, I'd rather keep my feet than be fashionable. I don't think they're too shabby though, sort of flashy!" He says, and I snap my eyes to his.

"Stay out of my head." I say before even thinking the words, and his eyes widen a little. He raises his hands in an apologetic gesture, dropping his gaze from mine.

He brushes past me, the comforting coolness that is him retracting from my mind, leaving me alone to lace myself into the boots.

_Very nice, Evy. You're making it real easy for both of you to adjust, being so pleasant and sweet all the time. How do you do it?_

I grimace, yanking the laces a bit more forcefully than is necessary, wishing I could just move past all this. Move past it like the Doctor had inadvertently taught me to over the years.

_But he's gone, and it's just me, and I have to be strong for myself. _

_For now. Maybe forever. I don't know._

I finally lace myself into the boots, and take the first step towards the console room.

_Jeez, it's at least an extra five pounds on each foot! How are we going to get around in these for long?_

I heave myself into the console room, making an awful lot of racket, to see that he's waiting for me by the doors, looking sullen.

I take a deep breath, pushing the guilt away.

_He's the one who did this to us, yanked me into this universe…_

He gives me a little smile then, watching me drag myself towards the doors, as if he finds it incredibly adorable.

_But by doing so, he also saved my life… If he had let the timeline progress naturally, I would be dead right now._

"Would you like to do the honors, Miss Crenshaw?" He says, nodding to the doors, holding out his arm.

My eyes shift to that arm for a moment, before I take it. Without a word, I push gently on the doors, and they swing open.

I can feel him watching me, feel that I've hurt him.

_"It would be my pleasure, Mr. Doctor."_

_That's what I'm supposed to say, I know… _

_I just can't. This is all crazy and chaotic and wrong…_

"So what's with the rainbow rock?" I say as I step out onto this bright mess of color. He snaps out of his funk, pointing down to our feet.

"It's not the rock that's causing the color, per se. It's what's on it," He says, and when I look at him, his eyes glimmer in excitement, "The rock is called kovak, made of a very special, very beautifully structured molecule that turns a certain color whenever a substance of a specific pH comes into contact with it."

I almost smile, watching him rant.

_His first adventure as this Doctor. A test run, so to speak._

"So it's sort of like an indicator? Like they do to test for things in medical labs and such?" I say, trying to keep up as he takes the lead and starts stomping his way faster across the slightly squishy rainbow rock.

"Exactly, well sort of, yes!" He says, pausing to point to a particularly diversely colored spot, "See that right there, that means that there a lot of different levels of acid. The bright green is the highest concentration, then purple, then pink, then orange, then yellow, and so on."

"Well, what's the acid from? Is it pollution?" I say, and he shakes his head, extricating himself from me to crouch down on a bright green patch. I flinch when he reaches for it, but his hand just hovers over the ground, as if longing to touch it.

"No, not at all, the indigenous life here tends to avoid this area. It's bacteria, little tiny single-celled organisms feeding on the rock itself. They can metabolize kovak like it's nothing, like it's… yummy. Their waste is extremely acidic." He says, retracting his hand and standing up, "Imagine, if you were to trip, that acid would melt you to a a gummy puddle after about... Oh, twenty minutes or so!"

"Oh, good, how lovely." I say, suddenly aware of how easy it would be to topple over in these ridiculous boots, "What about the T.A.R.D.I.S, is she going to be alright in it?"

"Oh better than alright, her shields are completely functional, she'll be right as rain."

I nod, and we look out into the vast plain of colorful rock, lined with brightly colored foliage, short little stumpy trees, which must also be adapted to this horrid environment, judging by the color.

What seems to be a cliff lies off in the distance, with a hazy horizon beyond it, blue-ish magenta, just like the sky. It looks like Candyland or something, with all these bright colors everywhere...

"Watch this." The Doctor says, giving me a eyebrow wiggle before making a god-awful gurgling, snorting sound in the back of his throat. He turns, leans back, then jerks forward, launching a gigantic ball of spit onto the ground in front of us.

_Umm… _

I give him a faltering grin, nodding my head as if in approval.

"Wow, a very impressive spitting… radius." I say, and he preens, lifting his chin proudly.

"Thank you, I won gold in the Haldorian Spitlympics of 9654… But that's not what I meant, look!" He says, pointing to the ground, where his saliva landed.

The kovak had been yellow, but now it's just… gray. Like Earth rock or something.

"Whoa…" I say and he nods.

"The water in my spit helped to neutralize the acid. Wouldn't work on that more concentrated acid, but still… Cool, isn't it?"

I give him a mischievous smirk, then gather a good amount of spit in my own mouth before trying to launch it the same way he did.

It ends up just kind of oozing down my chin, and onto my special glass boots.

The Doctor lets out a ringing sort of belly-laugh, and I can't help but smile as I wipe my mouth with my sleeve.

"And I thought my form was nearly perfect!" I say, and he puts his arm around my shoulders, squeezing me to him.

"Don't get yourself down, it takes years of careful practice and dedication to master the technique." He says. We walk like that for a bit, his arm around me, my body sort of jostling against his as we struggle to lift our feet.

It feels nice, at least acting like we're close again.

_Feeling it though, that's another story…_

"Doctor…"

"Hmm?"

"Did I have a dog when I was little?"

He opens his mouth, eyes upon the color-streaked sky.

"Hopefully, love dogs, dogs are a sentient life-form's best friend, who doesn't love a nice dog?" He says, and I nod slowly.

"Yeah… I was just wondering… Where your Evy branched off from me, you know, where the timelines split." I pause, and when he doesn't say anything, I let out a breath, starting to feel my leg muscles burn, "I mean, how different were we? Did she have a dog named Juju who meant the world to her when she was little? Did she feel as lonely as I did? Did she hate spiders? Did she love Greek food? I look like her and I talk like her, and I might even think like her, but… This morning I was rummaging through a stranger's closet for clothes, I'm wearing someone else's…"

I duck my head and lower my voice.

"Underwear…" I finish, and his brows rise above the line of his forehead, his green eyes wide. He nods quickly.

"Right, of course you'll be curious, I mean after all, this is a whole new universe. You wouldn't be Evy if you weren't curious…" He says, and shrugs his arm from my shoulders, letting it hang at his side, "You are her. She was you. Don't you understand, you're the same exact version of a human being! The only thing that's different is you happened to be in different places at any given point in time."

"No, that's not true, I don't believe that for a second. I think that what makes a person, what changes their view of the world, are their experiences in life, and… I can tell that you two had different experiences together. The evidence is everywhere, all over the T.A.R.D.I.S… She was different, and I am not that person."

I hesitate, the words tripping on my tongue.

_Don't take it out on him, Evy. Be gentle, okay? He's hurting, too…_

"No matter how much you want me to be." I settle with, but apparently that wasn't gentle enough because he refuses to look at me, walking in front of me with more and more momentum.

"Can you answer my question?" I say, trying my best to keep up, but his legs are a bit longer, and he's really booking it now.

"Which one? You bombarded me with at least six." He calls back over his shoulder, and I press my lips together, tamping down the annoyance.

_He loves to bob and weave, doesn't he?_

"How different was she?"

He remains silent, and at this point, my eyes are practically boring holes into his back.

_Why is he doing this? How are we ever going to get past this if he doesn't talk to me?_

"Doctor, you can't-"

I freeze, and so does he.

A shadow, short but wide, rushes over me, over the Doctor, banking towards the cliff to our right.

I look up, trying to find the source, squinting when I can't make out any movement in the streaked sky.

The Doctor meets my gaze over his shoulder when I look to him. A spark jolts between us, an understanding, and I run towards him, as quick as I can in these dumb boots. He holds out his hand, his eyes scanning the sky above us, darting to and fro.

"Careful, careful! One tumble and you've got chemical burns so bad, your ancestors will feel it! Wouldn't want to inconvenience Azara, would we?" He says when I stumble a little over my own feet, trying to run, keep an eye on the Doctor, and watch the sky for whatever is stalking us, all at the same time.

_So we met Azara in this universe..._

"There couldn't have been, I don't know, glass-soled trainers, or glass-soled track shoes? They had to be these clunky platform boots?" I say, huffing and puffing as we pick up our pace.

"They're just a little on the heavy side! You're one to talk, you're a hundred pounds heavier than they are! How would you feel if they commented on your weight?" He says, and I wish I had the time and breath to chew him out, but I simply don't.

"Any idea what it is?" I huff instead, my gaze lifting upward once again.

And then my feet stop functioning, slowing to a complete halt within a few seconds.

It's dark, completely dark. Pitch black.

The colorful ground is gone, the pretty magenta streaked sky, the bright foliage… All turned into swirling darkness, curling inwards towards me, obscuring everything.

My eyes widen, my breath coming even quicker.

"Doctor!" I screech, swaying forward when I feel his hand leaving mine, "Where are you?"

_What's happening? Why can't I see? _

"Evy, just stay calm, your mind is being tampered with, your visual cortex if you want to be specific. It's just- HEY! Get back here! Thief! I need that!" I hear the Doctor shout over the sound of wings, and then heavy footsteps, stomping away from me.

Leaving me.

_Alone._

I suck in a few tentative breaths, feeling the warm wind on my skin, the only indication that I'm still where I was a moment ago.

The darkness doesn't lift as I hoped it might.

"Doctor?" I whisper, the darkness beginning to sweep me into a new level of fear, one that eats away at my voice, "Please, where are you?"

I put my hands out in front of me, and then place one foot in front of the other. I can't stop my eyes from searching the darkness ahead, even though I know it's in vain.

_He left me! He actually left me, knowing I couldn't see, knowing I was helpless!_

A few more steps, feeling my way with the front of the clunky boots protecting me from the acid.

_I can't believe this. If I die, after all he's put us through to prevent just that, I swear I'm coming back to haunt the holy hell out of him._

"Hello?" I hiss, practically jumping out of my skin and turning my head towards the sound of rock upon rock. Like someone has thrown a stone or something.

It startles me, causing me to shift my feet just a little too fast for the boots that contain them, hitting an uneven patch of rock, and…

_Well this is not good… This whole situation is the opposite of good._

I fall onto my hands and knees, and immediately feel a tingling on my skin.

_Ohh, just freakin' perfect._

"Doctor!" I shout one last time, scrambling to stand up, wiping the moisture off my hands on my blouse, and then belatedly realizing that maybe that wasn't the best idea.

The sheer material doesn't do much to protect the skin of my stomach underneath, in fact, I believe it's absorbed the stuff.

_Keeping it in contact with my skin._

It begins to sting immediately. My hands and knees go from tingling to a slow sort of burning sensation, causing me to panic a little.

_How am I supposed to help myself if I can't even see what I'm doing?_

I have to keep myself from wiping furious tears from my eyes, from the pain and from the feeling I can't tamp down anymore, the feeling that I'm beginning to think is less and less irrational.

Abandonment.

_He kidnapped me, he regenerated, he left me with this stranger, he left me to fend for myself, blind and alone._

_Alone. Alone. Alone._

The burning pain turns to stabbing agony, causes adrenaline to course through me, and the darkness begins to whirl to life, into shapes. A form begins to take shape, latching onto my fear, conjuring up a nightmare.

The flash of a killer's eyes. The glint of sharpened rows of teeth.

An angry creature with scales as black as the longest night, intelligent eyes as red as fresh blood.

_A Drackon? Here?_

It regards me hungrily, its tongue snaking out from between its fangs. I can barely make out its black wings flaring in the darkness around us.

_Before he ditched me, he said something about my visual cortex being messed with…_

_This must be it, it can't be real. Can it?_

The Drackon begins to prowl towards me, faster and faster, and I back up clumsily, one hand behind me, one hand in front as a feeble attempt to protect myself.

And suddenly, it's the Doctor, black like the Drackon, made of wisps of pure darkness, standing there with a wide, crooked grin gracing his familiar face. His eyes glow bright gold.

_My Doctor. _

His black hair is tousled, his skin and body colorless, but it looks like him.

He gives me a wink before holding out his hand. My hearts do a desperate little flip, writhing with hope.

_Is this him? It can't be him, no, obviously not, but what if he's somehow okay, what if it's a message? What if…_

I can't help the thrill of relief that washes over me, seeing his face again, even as dark and wrong as it is right now.

"Is it you?" I whisper. The Doctor nods slowly, wisps of black curling off of him from the movement, reaching towards me more urgently.

And that's when I feel like an idiot for believing, even for just a second, that this hallucination, this lie, could be him…

I shake my head, the tears coming more freely now as gut instinct takes over, telling me that taking his hand would have been a very poor choice indeed.

"You can't talk. You can't talk because you're a visual hallucination. You're not real. You're gone."

The phantom retracts its hand, glowering at me, and then he's gone, dissolved into the blackness, and in his place stands… A woman. Made of darkness, like the Doctor had been, but I don't think I know her.

_No, I don't know her. Just a random hallucination, it probably means nothing…_

She has wild hair, curlier than mine by far, and a sort of sultry look about her. One hand is resting on a gun holster at her hip, the other waving at me, a smug smile on her face. She's either very friendly, or very patronizing…

"Evy, don't worry, I've got the sonic back! All I had to do was spit on the little bugger! Skin adapted to acid reacts poorly with… Evy? Oh, Evy, I leave you for one minute…" I hear the Doctor to my left, the approach of stomping boots, and the woman turns towards his voice, too.

She smiles, as if that voice means love to her, means happiness and joy, and then presses her fingers to her lips, blowing a kiss in his direction.

And then she's gone, up in smoke, back to the shapeless darkness that surrounds me once again.

I realize my mouth is gaped open.

"Let's get you back to the T.A.R.D.I.S. That nasty little Ghastor's effect will wear off soon, but those acid burns are getting a bit icky. Come along, there won't be any scarring if we get back quickly."

I feel his hands on my shoulders, but I wrench out of his grasp, my eyes darting around near where I think he might be.

"You don't love me anymore." I say bluntly.

He hesitates for too long, and his silence is worse than anything he could have possibly said in that moment.

I can't stand the thought of him looking at me while I can't see him... Him observing my pain and vulnerability and emotion laid bare before him, while he's even more unreachable than ever to me.

I begin walking forward, blindly following the faint hum of the T.A.R.D.I.S in my mind, made clearer by the numbness overtaking my thoughts, her melody sort of dissonant and garbled.

The Doctor makes a distressed little grunting sound, yanking me back towards him, hugging me against his chest.

"Aaaand that would be a cliff, how about we not die today, yeah?" I hear his breathy voice above me, and I mechanically push myself out of his embrace, trying to keep my face clean of the evidence of my heart breaking.

He's silent for another moment, and again, I hate his eyes on me, the taste of his ever present mind full of desperate distress.

_The acid on my skin is dull compared to this._

"That's not true, Evy." I hear the Doctor behind me, getting closer with his stupid boots, my own stupid boots preventing me from fleeing quicker than a snail's pace in this darkness, "You know it isn't."

"Do I? And how would I know that if you won't _talk_ to me? Your actions sure as hell don't tell me for you." I say, wiping a stray tear from my cheek, and immediately regretting it.

Acid burns the sensitive skin like a match put to gasoline.

I curse colorfully, and finally shut up and allow him to steer me in the right direction. He doesn't talk about what I said.

_He's hardly ever avoided anything important between us, especially when we fought. He used to flare up, come to life and show me that he cared enough to fight. This new man, he doesn't care enough to explain himself, or his feelings, or his thoughts, not in the slightest…_

_Perhaps he would prefer to just forget that anything has even changed. To just forget that we're screwed up, were never meant to meet, let alone be here together._

_The man who forgets. Just what I need when all I want is to remember…_

He chooses to babble on about the Ghastor instead. Apparently they're scavenging creatures native to this area, structurally similar to a flying squirrel of Earth, adapted to the acidic environment. They're rather feeble things, though, unable to strong-arm their way to survival, and have developed a telepathic method meant to distract.

Their telepathic field causes the neurons in the visual cortex to misfire for a short time, causing hallucinations and temporary blindness that allows the Ghastor to steal from its victim.

_The vulture of this planet, never hunting or gathering for itself, only taking from others…_

_Of course,_ he explains, _a parlor trick like that wouldn't work on a full Time Lord, no way, not a chance._

I used to find his gloating endearing, kind of adorable, the way he would preen…

Right now, though, it just makes me want to punch him with my acid hands.

_Keep avoiding it, you stupid man. Let's see how long you can duck and roll before you give in… I've gotten to you plenty of times, why should this be any different?_

_You're still the Doctor and I'm still Evelyn Crenshaw. And I won't let you shut me out._

I repeat that mantra over and over in my head as the Doctor leads me quickly through the T.A.R.D.I.S doors.

_You're still the Doctor…_

* * *

><p>My vision comes back bit by bit, color and light flooding through the dissipating mist of black. The hallucinations, the monsters and friends and faceless ghosts hovering in the corners of my eyes... They all die with it.<p>

Eventually, I can focus on the face in front of me. The Doctor's green eyes, the color of green leaves in sunlight, are focused upon the task at hand, tending to my burns…

He first took care of my hands and legs, making quick work of it, saying that they will be fine. The skin cells divide quickly on the hands, and heal better.

Now he's on my face, having removed the acid with a towel, damp with some kind of basic, acid-negating solution.

The sonic buzzes at a few different frequencies, its strange green light pulsing ever so slightly. It's a little disorienting at such a close proximity.

"There we are, all fixed up. You may have just a little scarring on your legs, but that's alright, scars are stories!" He says, twirling the sonic in his hand and giving me a smile, "And who doesn't love a good story?"

I clear my throat.

"Actually there's one more spot, it's on my stomach, just under my… Sort of up across my ribs." I say, pointing to the afflicted area, and his eyebrows rise slowly. He nods once in a determined manner.

"Right then! No time to lose, take it off!" He says, his face getting a little red.

_I mean, do I really need to take my whole shirt off for him to work on it?_

_No. But am I going to?_

_Yes._

_I need him to feel comfortable with me, but I don't know how to deal with him. I don't know, I truly don't know… _

_Anyway, it's not like he hasn't seen it before._

I grab the hem of my blouse and lift it up over my head, easing my curls out of it gently. I stare at him, keeping my face blank, dropping the blouse to the ground.

_Well, this is already a little strange..._

He fiddles with his fingers, then points to the floor. The cold, metal floor.

"Lay down, it'll be easier." He says, and I stand up from the console's seat.

"Yeah, okay." I say casually, easing myself down onto the floor slowly. Shivers run up and down my spine as soon as my bare skin touches the unforgiving metal, and the Doctor crouches next to me, damp towel in hand.

He stares at the angry, blistered burns before taking a gentle swipe at the wound.

I clench my teeth as the acid fights to stay on my skin, fights being extracted. It's quite painful, like a thousand needles puncturing my skin all at once.

"I'm sorry." The Doctor mutters, seeing my taut jaw and fisted hands.

"S'okay. Need to do it."

"No, not for this." He says, and when I look at him, his hand stills, hovering over the curve of my waist.

I wait for him to continue, watching the color of his eyes darken.

"I'm sorry for… this." He says, gesturing to himself, tossing the rag over his shoulder. Anger broils over his mind into mine.

I'm not sure what to say to that, so I just watch him as he pulls the sonic out again, pointing it at my bare stomach, causing the muscles to flutter as he puts it on a particularly strong frequency.

He watches the movement with interest.

"I don't know… myself, and I suppose I don't even know you. You were right, you aren't the same person, I'm not the same, and I'm sorry I tried to ignore that. It's just…" He says, trailing off, and clenching his jaw, as if speaking is becoming terribly difficult.

At last, I feel as though I have someone to sympathize with. Someone who understands what it's like.

To lose someone, but have them standing right in front of you.

"Overwhelming… I know... I completely get it. I mean, if you think about it, I'm alone. No one in this universe is mine, no one belongs to me, and I don't belong to anyone. Not even my parents in this universe, I can't even call them mine. Not even the elements in my body belong here… I'm completely alone now. It would be easier to just pretend we're..." I trail off, realizing the truth of the words as they leave my mouth.

_I really am. I have no one, not really._

"Welcome to a day in my life." He says, giving me a regretful smirk, waving the sonic over me one last time before stashing it in his pocket.

_Last of his kind, no matter what universe… I suppose that's even more bleak. At least there are other humans for me. He honestly is alone… Without me, that is…_

_And I'm alone without him..._

"But we can't just make believe that everything is normal, that nothing's changed..." I say softly, and he nods.

We're quiet for a few moments, before I feel the need to break the silence.

_Plus the sooner I get off this freezing metal floor, the better._

"So, will there be any scarring there? Do I have to worry about bikini season?" I say, and he lets out a little chuckle. He runs his fingers over the now smooth skin on my stomach, leaving a trail of goosebumps. My hearts do an inexplicable little leap at his touch, pulsing a little faster in false anticipation.

_An innocent, chaste touch, nothing more._

_Calm down, body. _

"Not at all, I think you'll be just fine, look at you, you're perfect. No one will even notice." He says, smiling and standing up to offer me his hand. I take it, and he pulls me to my feet towards him, a hand on my bare waist to steady me.

It's moments like this that I know it's him. I know it's the Doctor, no matter which one, no matter from which universe, because otherwise, I wouldn't be feeling this way. I wouldn't ache to feel him hold me, or want more than anything else to feel that coolness threading its way through my thoughts, whispering memories of love to my entire being.

I let out a nervous chuckle, stepping back to carefully snatch my blouse off the floor, intensely aware of the absence of his hands on me.

"Thank you. For healing me." I say, feeling a little exposed, being unable to put the acid-laced shirt back on…

"Anytime you've got second degree chemical burns, I'm your man!" He says, nodding, making his way to the console as I turn away towards the bedroom wing, taking a few steps.

_But I'm not quite done with you, am I?…_

I turn back abruptly.

"And Doctor?"

"Hmm?"

I run my newly healed hand through my hair, rubbing the back of my head.

"Can we… sort of start over? I was just thinking, maybe it would be easier…" I say.

His hands pause over the foreign buttons and levers, the T.A.R.D.I.S letting out a sort of groaning hiss. He pats the console, as if reassuring her, and she goes back to humming.

"Of course," he says, "Hello Evy, nice to meet you, I'm the Doctor, I'm a Time Lord from Gallifrey, I hate pears, and I enjoy long walks on the beach... I think. The hatred of pears is tentative, haven't really tried one with this mouth yet."

I can't tell if he's making fun of me, or just trying to be funny.

_It's going to take some time getting used to this new brand of sarcasm._

"A pleasure to meet you… Mr. Doctor." I say, and give him a little grin. I see his eyes crinkle around the edges, appreciative and somewhat relieved, before I turn towards the bedroom wing, making my way through our room... his room... to the doorway at the end of it. The doorway to my old room.

"Don't take too long getting changed, alright? No hair fluffing, no make-up applying, none of that! I've got something I want to show you!" I hear him call from the console room.

"No promises." I say, and as I pass through the doorway, it feels like entering a gateway to the past, a snapshot of something long gone and ancient.

It looks like my room still, with a few minor changes. The mirror matches the one in the Doctor's room now, all tall and arched and rather gigantic. The curved, coral supports are gone, replaced by clean-cut metal beams. The bed is still draped in those delightful orange Rownish silk sheets.

_I'll sleep alone tonight, and it may be strange, and a little bit painful, but that doesn't mean I'm giving up._

_This isn't a sad thing._

_It just means we're trying our best. Starting at square one._

_Giving 'not being miserable' our best go..._

I let out a sigh, making my way to the dresser in the far corner of the room.

_This is now the second time today that I've rummaged through someone else's clothes._

I find that a lot of the things in her dresser are clothes I either had in my universe or would have liked to have. I can tell she liked dresses as much as I do.

My hands grip a pair of tights and a black and red patterned dress, bringing it up to my chest in front of the mirror. I turn a few times, pondering the cut of the dress, and whether the pattern will go better with polka dotted tights or...

"Evy! I said no hair fluffing, we're wasting time!" I hear the whining voice of the Doctor, and I bite back a smile.

_Impatient like a five year old, as well, I see._

_There are so many things I don't know about him now. Treating him as I see him, as a stranger from a different universe, is the only way I'll be able to get through this with my sanity in tact, I think. Perhaps the only way for him, too._

"We've got a time machine, time is irrelevant!" I call back, fluffing my curls a bit.

_Well, I suppose I'd better open my mind, start on getting to know him now. After all..._

_There's no time like the present._


	2. A Childish Facade

"Doctor, don't get me wrong, the universe's largest ball pit was cool…" I say, pressing my hands against the familiar doors.

"Wasn't it? We should've stayed longer, I didn't get to try the diving board." He says, and I smirk.

_He definitely brings out the inner child, that's for sure…_

"But… This isn't going to be another Playground Planet, is it?" I say, and he shakes his head, nodding to the doors.

I flash him a real smile then, swinging the doors open and stepping out into sunlight, bringing my hand up to shield my eyes…

It's a beach.

A beach of white sand with water stretching out to the horizon as far as I can see. Hot, muggy wind lifts my hair up to tickle my face gently.

_Smells like Earth. Looks like Earth…_

"A vacation, already? Two days, and you're ready for a break?" I say, and he comes out to stand next to me, giving me a smug sort of look.

"Notice anything strange about this ocean, just the tiniest bit off?" He says, and I take another look at the water, trying its best to lap at my feet.

_Wait…_

_No, it's not. It's just… still. Not moving an inch._

"There aren't any waves."

"There aren't any waves!" He repeats louder, "No waves, that's odd, isn't it? There's wind, which is what causes your typical ocean waves back on your lovely little Blue Planet, so why aren't there waves?"

_So this isn't Earth… _

My gaze rises to the cloudless blue sky, and I count three moons, each at different phases in the cycle.

_Definitely not Earth._

"What about those? The gravitational pull could have something to do with it." I say, and he follows my gaze, then beams proudly at me, green eyes dancing.

"It could, and it does! See, ocean waves are no different from any other type of wave, in the most basic of thinking. They have a wavelength, and they have a frequency, just as light waves and sound waves do." He says, moving his hand in an up and down, curved motion, like the waves should be doing, "But say, another wave, with the same frequency and wavelength is produced, opposite direction…"

He makes his other hand into a wave, colliding with the first, and both of them flat-line.

"They cancel out." I say, and he grins, nodding and causing his hair to fall into his face.

"The waves made by the gravitational pull, this planet's version of tides, if you want to name them specifically, cancel out the waves made by the wind! Only for an hour or so once every hundred years or so, when everything lines up just right in this exact spot on the planet." He says.

"And we're here just at the right time to see it." I say with an awe-struck smile, looking out over the strangely glass-like water, "Well, where's all the people?"

"How do you mean?"

"Is this planet not inhabited or something? I mean, if it's such a rare occurrence, there should be a crowd of people, shouldn't there? That's how it would be on Earth, at least…"

The Doctor looks thoughtful for a moment, then spins around in a circle, squinting, as if the people might just be hiding in the sand.

"You're right, the people, where are the people? This is a Level two planet, so communication about this event worldwide is improbable, but the nearby seasonal settlements should at least be mildly interested…"

"Or at least the children, I mean… Something rare as this, human kids would be skipping class to see it." I mutter, and the Doctor glances at me, concern creasing his forehead.

"No class, no school, they're not at that point yet. Survival is the name of the game, hunters and gatherers, simple tools, that sort of stuff. Which makes me even more worried, an event like this should be something of a spiritual type thing for them." He says.

We stare at one another for a moment, nothing but the breeze to fill the silence.

"So what would keep them from seeing the power of the gods, or message from the heavens, or whatever they think it is?" I say, and he turns on his heel, marching across the sand, back towards the T.A.R.D.I.S.

I scramble to follow him.

"Oh, a number of things, maybe they're on holiday, maybe they just forgot, or maybe, I don't know… widespread death and disease." He says, turning abruptly, and staring me dead in the eyes, barely an inch away.

My hearts clench at the thought.

_I don't know who lives here, or what they look like, or if they're friendly._

_But I really don't want that, not today, not ever…_

"Don't say that." I say softly, and he nods slowly.

"You're right, let's just go with holiday for now." He says, and then he's off again, marching past the T.A.R.D.I.S, towards the dense line of trees in the distance, past the sand.

"Who are they, though?" I say once I've caught up again.

"This planet is Uruk Nam, home to a few different species, all in line to become dominant at this point. Could be one of three of the more advanced ones, all pseudo-humanoids, the Kai-ba, the Tai-ba, or the Lai-ba. All from a common ancestor eons ago, now in competition for the throne, so to speak," He says, raising his arms to gesture to the forest around us, a dome of green, and then behind us, to the glass ocean, "Who will win all of _this_? Who will be allowed to evolve to be the best?"

He grins as he pauses to take in the world around us, a child-like wonder on his face, enthrallment sweeping out of his mind and into mine. The echoes of his awareness seep into my own.

_It's all so beautiful, so intricate. So very delicate, yet incredibly resilient._

He gives me a sideways glance, as if he hadn't been aware that he had made the connection between our thoughts…

_Or did I do that?_

I withdraw, slowly building up my walls, trying to seem polite about it, but the smile fades from his eyes, and he continues the march into the forest.

"Alright but why did you say disease, I mean that's a pretty specific guess…" I say, and he slows his pace for just a moment, before shaking his head and speeding on, whacking a vine away from his face.

"Just an inference, logical deduction. Primitive races get sick, it's what they do, all germy and clueless, you know? Germ-bags! Bags of germs, that's what you lot came from, so it's only to be expected…" He says.

_Fair enough…_

"But we can help… If it is sickness, we're allowed to help them, it's not a fixed point, or something? Because I thought the plan was to try and avoid those pesky fixed points, never really turns out well for us." I say and he nods, waving a hand up dismissively.

"Yes, of course, I learned my lesson, I wouldn't have brought… Do you smell smoke, a sort of smokey smoke burning smell?" He says, lifting his chin and sniffing loudly a few times.

I breathe in through my nose, and sure enough, there it is. The scent of wood burning, and something else I can't quite put my finger on.

"Yeah, definitely, but where is it coming from?" I say, and he paces around in a circle, sniffing with his nose in the air like some kind bloodhound on two legs. He whips out the sonic, and it buzzes as he whirls around. The prongs at the top flare out, he stares at it for a few moments, and then points in several directions before choosing just one.

"This way. Quickly, where there's smoke… There's trouble." He says, and we jog through the underbrush, dodging the thick trunks of the trees, the hanging moss, the vines.

"Well, I think we can rule out holiday." I huff, jumping over a particularly gigantic tree root, and as soon as my feet hit the ground, a disconcerting sound echoes through the jungle before us. We stop dead in our tracks…

For many, many people, it was the last thing they ever heard in life.

For many, many people, it will be the last thing they hear in life.

_"Where is the Time Lord? Explain or you will be exterminated!"_

My stomach twists into a sickened knot.

"Yeah, I think we can. But let's go say hello anyway…" The Doctor says, his voice low and full of the hatred I know that voice induces in him.

A chill runs over me, and it's then, from the look in his new eyes, from the silken death in his voice, that I know this Doctor will have fewer qualms about ridding the universe of anyone who gets in his way. Permanently.

_I've got my eye on you, buddy. We don't kill, we don't use weapons, that's not how we do it…_

_Even Daleks are alive, we always try our best to avoid killing them. _

_Doesn't always work, but we try…_

The smoke gets thicker as we get closer to a clearing, with what seems to be little… huts, made of dried grasses and branches, stuck together with mud.

"Exterminate!"

The Doctor's hands drag me down, and into a bush of thick, waxy green leaves, a finger to his lips.

A laser blast rings through the forest, and I hear it hit its mark, a few muffled screams and whimpers.

We peer through the leaves to see that in the center of the ring of little mud huts, there sits a small ship, a trail of burning earth behind it. It's obviously made for travel through deep space, from the shape and size of the thrusters.

Fire has charred the ground from when it landed, rather unexpectedly, by the looks of it. It's definitely not Dalek in origin, yet…

I can see the Dalek now, a single Dalek, hovering in front of a huddled group of green and brown rough skinned humanoids, as if they're made of tree bark. Their gigantic eyes are even wider with terror, and they hold up their large, four fingered hands in surrender.

"Kai-ba, then." The Doctor mutters, "What are you doing here though, Dalek?"

"Same plan as always for a lone Dalek?" I hiss, and the Doctor raises a brow, giving me a questioning look, "Oh don't tell me… Okay, just follow my lead."

"You will reveal the location of the Time Lord!" The Dalek shouts, priming its laser, and I grab the Doctor's shoulders, shoving him out into the clearing.

He lets out an undignified yelp as he stumbles a little, hopping on one leg to regain his balance, then straightens under the gaze of all the Kai-Ba.

And the Dalek.

I begin to creep around the clearing, through the underbrush, trying to keep quiet.

_I need a better view of the circuitry…_

"You are the Doctor." The Dalek says, and I actually detect a hint of surprise at that, which is odd for two reasons.

First, Daleks don't really have emotions besides rage and hatred.

Two, this Dalek is looking for a Time Lord. Who else would he expect?…

"Hi, yes, I am the Doctor, hello! I heard you asking about me, decided to drop in, see what all the fuss was about." The Doctor says, stalling just as I knew he would.

"The Predator of the Daleks. You will tell me where the Time Lord is." The Dalek says, landing on the ground gently, and making its way towards the Doctor, completely focused on him.

_Perfect._

I ease my way out of the brush, creeping up on the Dalek, silent on the soft ground.

"Not sure what you're on about, you stupid hunk of metal, I'm right here in front of you... and I don't know anything about a 'Predator', so you can go ahead and shut up about that, save us all the time and energy." The Doctor says, and the Dalek regards him for a moment, its eye-stalk focusing in and out.

"_You_ are the Predator of the Daleks." It says, and the Doctor's eyes widen, his finger jabbing into his own chest.

"Me? I'm the Predator? Oh, come on, you've got to be kidding me, that's a bunch of rubbish!" He shouts, and I finally get close enough to see the circuitry I need, just between the trunk and the dome of the Dalek. A tiny exposure that the Doctor and I only discovered by accident, on our last encounter with a Dalek. I felt it while desperately trying to find a weakness, not having very much energy to spend...

The Dalekanium encased wiring that carries the electrical flow to both the weapons systems, as well as the vocal projection, which is really useful because it disables them, and manages to shut them up all at once.

I reach out to it, feeling around for the prick of pain in my brain.

_Good thing I had been saving up to murder myself! This will be easy._

I feel the vibrating little atoms of the Dalekanium wire, the bonds that connect them so tightly, and then I dissolve them. Just enough to sever the connection.

It takes a chunk out of the energy I have stored up, a little less than half.

_Dalekanium is some tough stuff…_

The head of the Dalek swivels around, its eye-stalk focusing on me. I give it a little smile and wave, before walking past it to the Doctor.

"Brilliant, that's absolutely brilliant! Why didn't I think of that?"

"You were too busy thinking of the many ways to slaughter it, I think," I say, and from the way his smile falters, I know I'm right.

It's then that we realize we have an audience.

The tree-colored people, the Kai-Ba, all still huddled, not knowing whether they should fear us as well. Their long, thin tails are twitching about anxiously.

The Doctor straightens his bowtie, and approaches them slowly, his head bowed slightly.

"So sorry about all that, maybe we can help rebuild the huts," he says, gesturing to the several huts that had been blasted apart by the laser of the Dalek, "But for now, is anyone hurt?"

They just stare at him.

"He's a doctor… In a manner of speaking. He can help you if you let him." I say, keeping my voice soft and calm.

They glance at one another warily, a silent exchange, before they part and a few of them carry a small, fragile looking thing forward.

My throat clenches tightly, almost painfully, my eyes stinging a little as I watch the limp little body being laid on the ground.

_It's a child._

The Doctor lets out a regretful breath before crouching, taking out the sonic, and waving it over him.

I notice that his leg is blackened, probably where the laser clipped him. The blast will have travelled through his body, through all of his nerve endings, from that very spot, scorching it all as it goes.

_He's already dead._

The Doctor puts the sonic back into his jacket, and covers his mouth, as if wishing he could wipe the frown from it.

"I'm so sorry, but… I can't do anything." The Doctor says, and I swipe at the tears that escape my eyes when one of them lets out a soft little wail, kneeling by the little one.

The Doctor stands up, watching them as they pick the child back up, to take him to one of the huts that are still standing.

I tear my gaze away from the heartbreaking procession when I feel rage and bloodlust well up in the Doctor's mind, seeing that he's marching towards the Dalek.

"Doctor?" I say, starting after him, but he's already gotten the sonic out, and a few sparks have already flown from the Dalek's mechanical shell, causing its eye-stalk to swivel back and forth in panic.

"You were looking for _me_, trying to kill _me_, but instead you murdered an innocent child, do you understand? A child, gone in under a millisecond, snuffed out for absolutely no reason. So… Unless you can defend your actions in the next five seconds, I'm going to exploit that break in your circuits, and I'm going to blow you to pieces." He says, his free hand gripping the eye-stalk with white knuckles, forcing it to look him in the eye.

"Doctor, what's done is done, more killing won't make you feel better, you know that." I say softly, but he pays me no mind.

"What's the matter, cat got your tongue, Dalek?" He spits venomously, pointing the sonic at the its dome, and it waves its useless weapons system up and down, in a pitiful attempt at keeping him away.

_It can't speak even if he really was giving it a chance… I shut down its vocal systems._

"Doct-"

I duck my head as the sonic buzzes and a flash of electricity causes the Dalek to short-circuit, the smell of electrocuted flesh rising from it.

The Doctor steps back from the lifeless thing, waving the smoke away from his blank face, completely emotionless. He glances at me, and for just a split second, I see a sort of contrite shame in his eyes, but it's gone in another instant.

"How about we see what's on that ship?" He says, walking past me without another word, and I stare at the dead Dalek for a moment, before turning to follow him.

_My God, he didn't even hesitate… He toyed with it. Gave it the tiniest hope that it may live another day before he killed it…_

The Doctor walks around the crashed ship, knocks on the outside of it, puts his ear to it. Then he sonics the length of it.

"Was shot down by that Dalek, laser damage to the left rotary engine." He says, and after using the sonic on it once more, a sheet of metal lowers with a hiss, revealing a ramp leading to the inside.

We glance at one another, and I hold his gaze as I brush past him, strengthening our connection just enough to let him feel my disappointment in full force.

Then I focus on the task at hand, staying alert to whatever could be on this ship… It doesn't look familiar to me in any way, which means that anything could be aboard...

"Let's see who's home…"

* * *

><p><strong>AN**

**Hey guys 3**

**SO, gimme some feedback, I don't even know how I'm doing, I'm just stumbling forward into the unknown, hoping what I'm doing is remotely good.**

**You people, the ones whose Doctor is Eleven, how am I doing with writing him so far? I mean, he's an alternate universe Eleven, sure, but he's still Eleven, right?**

**He's so fun to write, omg.**

**So, I hope your lives are all awesome today, and just a reminder that I starve and wither without reviews, they are my muse's source of life.**

**My muse is also sort of fat, and needs more than is necessary for normal day-to-day functioning... Also I created a Tumblr, follow if you want, my username is wibblywobblywhogirl on tumblr too!**

**Lots of love,**

**-A.**


	3. Out of the Past

Stepping into the ship, it's not the darkness that makes me uncomfortable, per se.

Though some of the metal walls are sparking, where the impact of the crash had damaged the infrastructure of the ship, it's not that either.

It's not the oddly homey, floral fragrance that seems to permeate the whole ship, sharply contrasting the foreboding appearance.

No…

It's the fact that the hallway before me seems to stretch on forever. It's really only about twenty or thirty feet long, but the ship itself isn't that wide.

_It can't be…_

I'm used to this sort of thing, that's not why I'm suddenly very wary.

_No one else in this universe should have the capacity to create or obtain this technology…_

_It's impossible._

"That's impossible." The Doctor says, echoing my thoughts, "Bigger on the inside. No, nope, not possible. Impossible, do you hear me? _Impossible_."

He seems angry, furious really, and I can understand why.

A technology that only one of his own people could possess and understand…

It's being dangled right in front of his face, just daring him to grasp it, daring him to allow himself be vulnerable to the shattering disappointment that I have a terrible feeling will no doubt come to visit once again…

He's furious that he's being given no choice but to feel this way, because the fact of the matter is, he has already begun to do just that.

Hope.

I can feel it, digging its claws into his furiously racing mind, exploding with emotion at the mere idea…

"Doctor, maybe there's another explanation… Optical illusion, perception filter…" I say, and he nods curtly as he brushes past me, a hand on the metal wall.

I follow him closely as he knocks on the wall with each step he takes, then pauses to sonic the entire length of the hallway. I expect the shimmering of a failing perception filter, or the groan of a machine as the sonic causes its illusion to fail.

Nothing happens.

"It's real. No alteration of our perception, this ship really is utilizing dimensionally transcendent engineering. Dimension dams…" He says, his voice small.

The instinct to curl my thoughts of support and comfort around him is nearly overwhelming, but...

_I don't know what to say. It's like trying to play psychologist to a stranger._

"There are only two races that figured that out in the whole of existence, and one of them is made up entirely by me… That I know of." He says softly, looking over his shoulder at me when I still don't say anything, his eyes intent upon mine.

He looks like he wants me to do something, say something, to make this horrid hope he's feeling disappear.

_When he finds out it's not another Time Lord, that he's still cursed as the last of his kind…_

I bite my lip, and reach my hand out to him, and he takes it, giving me a grateful and short-lived smile. We look down the darkened hall before us, the sparks that illuminate our way beckoning...

"The other race was the Daleks." He says as we begin to make our way down, to where I can see a split in the hall. One path to the left, one to the right.

"Dalek ships are made of Dalekanium, and this is definitely not Dalekanium. Besides, the architecture is all wrong..." I say, tapping the wall, listening to the dull thud it makes, "Also that Dalek shot it down, why would it attack one of its own ships?"

I can feel my words stoking the fire in his mind, excitement and impossible expectations trying their best to dig their way to the surface.

_Oh, sure, this is good, keep pushing him higher and higher, maybe this time he'll completely splat like a rotten tomato when he inevitably falls into spiraling loneliness._

_Very nice._

"It could also be stolen, I mean… It looks a little old." I say lamely, knowing it's kind of an outlandish thought, to say that someone could have stolen Time Lord technology from before the Time War…

"Or maybe… No, can't be." He mutters, shaking his head as we reach the fork in the hallway, pausing to glance down each way.

"This place could be infinitely huge, it'll take forever to search it…" I say, and the Doctor nods, squeezing my hand before sliding out of my grasp.

"Quite right, you go that way, I'll go this way, holler if you find anything, don't forget which way you came from." He says, suddenly bright and loud, marching away from me down the hall to the right.

_You can't be serious._

"Wait, really? Splitting up, now? Is that really a good idea?"

"Not a good one, no, but an efficient one, yes. Just don't do anything I wouldn't do, and you'll be fine. Call me if you need me." He says, tapping the side of his head with a single finger, and with that, he leaves me in the dim, impossible hallway.

"It's not me I'm worried about, you crazy alien…" I mutter before taking a deep breath and turning towards the left hall. It's a wall of darkness, this hallway is, the sparks fewer and far between.

_Since when have we split up in a situation like this? I feel like this is just asking for it…_

This branched hall looks to be much the same as the last one, except this one's floor is different. Kind of cushiony.

I crouch down, squinting in the nearly nonexistent light. I can see that it's pink carpet, soft as bunny fur when I touch it with the tips of my fingers.

I almost laugh, it's so ironic.

_Pink fluffy carpet on this big scary, impossible ship?_

I stand up and continue on, feeling tense in the silence. Nothing but my breath, my heartsbeat, and the low hum of the ship under my feet.

I reach through a doorway with outstretched hands and a light flickers on. And keeps flickering, like something out of a cheesy horror movie. I can see most of the room between flickers though. It looks strangely normal.

So normal, that it makes my insides squirm.

_I haven't seen a room this normal in nearly eight years._

There are what seems to be purple bean bags scattered about on the floor, which is covered in the same pink carpet from the hallway. Books are strewn about the right half of the room, having fallen from a rather tall bookshelf adhered to the wall. A wooden ladder with some of the rungs broken off lays on the floor.

It looks like a living room to me. A nice one, at that. Cozy.

_Something tells me that whoever runs this whole operation isn't exactly a threat…_

I continue on, towards the doorway on the opposite end of the circular room, nearly falling flat on my face when I trip over something.

"What the…" I growl, clenching my jaw at the pain of stubbing my toe.

Whatever it is, it's heavy and definitely metal.

I look behind me from my sprawl on the ground to see something familiar. Not the shape or the contraption itself. I'm almost sure I've never seen it before in my life.

But the Doctor I knew was always tinkering around, welding things together, making little gadgets. It looks like one of his little inventions, sitting there on the pink carpet, completely out of place. Antennas and wires protrude from all over it, winding in and out of the tiny ball of metal.

I try to pick it up, but no matter how hard I try, I can't do it. I turn around, crawling over to it, my curiosity getting the best of me.

_What? Is it attached to the floor? Is it part of the ship? Superglued to the carpet?_

I crawl around it, face practically to the floor, trying to see what is making it so heavy. My eyes catch upon a familiar jagged, round piece of metal, with a silently spinning iron bar in the center of the device.

A gravitational magnet. I remember the Doctor showing me something he'd made with that in it...

_"Why would you need it though? When would that come in handy?" I say, and he lifts his chin indignantly, twirling the device he'd run so eagerly to our room to fetch in his hands, his long fingers curling around it almost lovingly._

_"You're just not thinking creatively enough, Evy. What if you needed to sink something to the bottom of a very deep body of water? What if you needed a very reliable paper-weight?" He says smugly, as if those were very common problems that needed solving, "See! Creatively."_

_He flicks the iron bar into motion in the center of the cube, and as soon as it starts moving, I can see the weight of it increasing, burdening his hands. He drops it, his feet dancing out of the way just in time as it smashes into the floor._

_I grin, trying to push the square hunk of metal with my foot, to no avail. It remains embedded in the floor near the pool, sinking deeper into the pretty stone with every moment. Poor T.A.R.D.I.S..._

_"I think you made it a little too strong, though." I say, and he shrugs, "And you forgot an off switch."_

_"Minor details. Next time, it'll be perfect." He says, running his hand through his damp hair, his eyes suddenly crinkling, and immediately I know exactly what is coming. He ducks his shoulder and lifts me up, and just like that I'm back in the water with a Time Lord cannon-balling practically on top of me. When I break the surface, gasping for breath between laughs, it's his hands I register next, managing to bring goosebumps to my skin, even in the warm water._

I swallow thickly, finally leaving the contraption be, and stand up to give the room one last glance before heading through the doorway.

It's another hallway, longer than should be possible. The lights are still flickering, quicker now, and instead of apprehension, it's annoyance that they're beginning to cause.

_A seizure warning would've been nice before entering…_

At the end of the hallway is a wooden door. A completely average wooden door, hinged to the metal wall, with a normal doorknob and everything.

I raise a brow, grasping the knob and opening it slowly at first, then shoving it open and peering inside.

"Baaaaah!"

_Excuse me?_

In the dim light, which thankfully is not flickering in here, I see…

A goat.

And an alpaca.

_Oh, and another little goat!_

"A petting zoo?" I say, letting out an amused and relieved breath.

That's exactly what it is. It's a little petting zoo. The entire room is lined with pine shavings, the smell pleasant when mixed when the musky scent of a barn.

"What on earth are you guys doing on a spaceship, huh?" I say, my voice turning high-pitched and gooey at the sight of the animals.

_I should ask the Doctor to put in a petting zoo! This is actually a fantastic idea. Kudos, whoever made this ship._

I make my way to the goat's stall first, and they stick their funny little goat faces over the short fence. I smile when one nibbles at my arm gently, letting out a little bleat of greeting.

"Yes, hello to you, too!" I say, ruffling their furry little heads before moving to the alpaca in the next stall.

It lets out a low grunt when I reach my hand out to it, moving to the opposite side of its stall to show me its rear-end.

_Okay, a little less friendly than your buddies, I see._

I glance around, noticing a drippy faucet coming from the wall with a few buckets strewn about. A metal container is tipped over, with little pellets of food and grain spilled into the pine shavings. One purple rubber boot sits on the left side of the room, and the other sits on the opposite end.

"I bet you guys didn't appreciate the whole 'crashing' thing…" I mutter, and my eyes drift to the next doorway. I turn the faucet off as I pass by, hesitating, my eyes upon the doorway.

I frown, suddenly feeling… Something.

Unfamiliar and strange, I can't even tell what it is, but I do know that it's a disturbance.

_A telepathic disturbance._

There's only a handful of species I've ever been able to communicate with telepathically. Maybe two, other than the Doctor, of course.

One species was one that had branched off from a contemporary species of humans in my era. Though they were years behind our level of evolution, humanoid and exponentially more hairy than their neighboring species in Time, they had one advantage. Telepathy.

Telepathically, they were much weaker than me, even with me being the mutt that I am, only communicating in nonverbal sentiments of alarm when necessary. Their planet was treacherous. Even a cry for help could doom your entire group...

Another was a slimy and strange species, sort of like frogs mixed with snakes, but more mucosal and drippy. They could only communicate telepathically in colors and emotions, though, never actual words or sentences.

_This… I've never felt this, I don't think. _

I take a few steps towards the doorway, and the feeling gets stronger. A sort of cool pulsing.

I peek my head through the doorway, seeing that it's the control cockpit of the ship.

_Jackpot_.

I reach tendrils of my consciousness out as far as I can manage, towards the familiarity of the Doctor.

_I think I found something. I'm past the petting zoo, on my side of that split hall. You can't miss it._

**_What? Who..._**

I recoil immediately, staggering backwards through the doorway a little when a stranger's thoughts force their way into my own, bullying those words past my defenses as if they were nothing.

My hearts pound in surprise, my lungs working at full capacity suddenly. I try my best to reinforce my telepathic walls, knowing that if I can't protect my mind, I'm basically a sitting duck to whoever that was.

_Attack the mind and you can basically attack every single bodily and mental process a person can possess…_

I don't dare reach out to the Doctor again.

I hear something on the opposite end of the cockpit, the rustling of fabric, something being knocked over, and my hand flies to my mouth as I inhale sharply.

_Okay, don't freak out. Be cautious, but don't freak out…_

I swallow, my mouth suddenly bone dry, and take a few tentative steps towards the sounds. They seem to be coming from the front, where I can see two seats positioned away from me.

I peek around one of the tall backs of the seats, to see something unexpected.

A humanoid, slumped onto the floor in front of the seat. A girl.

"Hey." I say, crouching, all the fear gone in an instant, replaced by concern. I roll her over onto her back, and she stirs ever so slightly.

_She doesn't seem to be injured…_

My hands tap the sides of her face, which is framed by short, jaggedly cut reddish hair. She's dressed in a very nice, formal dress, with a gold bodice and cream train, and sleeves of gold lace.

It doesn't seem to quite fit her very well. Sort of baggy, as if she'd gotten the wrong size.

It's scorched in one spot, the familiar evidence of a Dalek's presence…

_She's quite pixie-like, isn't she? Harmless looking…_

"Hey," I say again, louder, "Are you alright?"

I place my fingers on her pulse point, and my hearts drop all the way down into my feet.

_Thud-thud-thud-thud. Thud-thud-thud-thud._

Four beats. Two hearts.

_Oh my god, it's true... This ship-_

She coughs and groans, causing me to snatch my hand back. Her face scrunches up before she opens her delicate mouth, and a stream of gold floats up to the ceiling, passing through it like it's nothing.

My jaw drops, and my eyes dart from the ceiling back to her face. I drop from my crouch to sit on the floor, staring at her, unable to move an inch.

_Regeneration energy._

"You're… But that's… You can't be." I whisper, and suddenly her eyes are open, gazing at me with startling intensity, a breath-taking amber gold that is painfully familiar.

_The same color as my Doctor's…_

I lick my lips nervously, holding her gaze precariously, warily.

Then she yawns, stretching a little, and sits up, glancing around the cockpit with what seems to be distaste.

"Excuse me, but have you noticed something off about this place?" She says, her voice scratchy and melodic at the same time.

I stare at her for a moment, my brain short-circuiting on one little fact, hung upon it like a repeating record...

_She's a Time Lady. She's a Time Lady. A real Time Lady. Gallifreyan, definitely Gallifreyan. Time Lady?!_

"A few things, actually." I say, cocking my head, scooting back a little.

Experience has taught me to be wary in situations like this, pink fluffy carpets and petting zoos or not.

"Oh, good, so it's not just me," She says, standing up and smoothing her dress, "For starters, this god awful wallpaper has got to go."

She strides over to the wall by the doorway and rips down a huge poster of some 70's band my dad had loved back in the day.

"Oh. Not wallpaper. Still, had to go, don't you agree?" She says, crumpling it up and tossing it over her shoulder. It hits me in the face.

I blink slowly, my brain trying and failing to catch up.

"And this dress? Tacky and frilly, hate it." She says, ripping it at the seams with a single jerk of her hand and tossing it over her shoulder as well.

It also hits me in the face.

She rubs her stomach absentmindedly, looking around as if suddenly confused.

"Where is he, where's Calix?" She says, and just like that, in her purple boyshorts and ill-fitted bra, she's out the doorway.

"Wait, is this your ship? How are you even here? Who are you?" I shout, tossing the dress to the side, scrambling to my feet to follow her.

"You know what, that is a very good question. I like you, you're good to have around, you ask the right questions." She says as she makes her way through the petting zoo, patting the alpaca as she passes, who seems to like _her_ just fine.

"Do you realize how impossible you are?" I say, and she pauses, turning to grin at me.

"I'll take that as a compliment, thank you very much, I try." She says, before continuing into the next hallway.

"Wait-" I say, slowing my pace in the dimmer light, the sparks on the wall causing me to take my time.

"You don't like the dark. I don't think I like the dark either. I used to, you know. I'd purposefully keep the lights on low power, make it a little dim. Cozy it up. I like a cozy ship, don't you? Do I? I think so." She says from the end of the hall, and I can make out her slim figure turning to corner into the next room.

I hear the buzzing of the sonic, and then the flickering in the next room turns into constant light, thankfully.

"Blimey! Bit under-dressed for a crash-landing, don't you think?" I hear the Doctor's startled voice, and finally I make it into the next room to see the girl put her hands on her thin hips.

"I am not. I am perfectly clothed, thank you. Besides, I did you a favor, I had been wearing an absolute train-wreck." She says, her voice indignant.

"Jenny!"

A boy with crew-cut black hair, wearing a fancy tuxedo, cut in an old style, runs into the pink-carpeted room, his face crumpling when he sees the red-haired girl.

"Oh, Jenny…" He says, shaking his head, his slanted brown eyes full of grief and despair, "I'm sorry, I tried to get the dead-lock to work in time. I tried, I'm so sorry…"

He brushes past the Doctor to place his long black jacket over Jenny's bare shoulders, seemingly unfazed by her state of undress.

"For what? I'm perfectly fine! See? Still me, just a different model! Third edition!" She says, twirling around, before giving him a big grin.

They stare for a moment before throwing their arms around one another, hugging tightly. I watch the Doctor carefully, knowing he'll be able to feel the disturbance of her mind, knowing he's realizing what she is.

He blinks slowly, his throat bobbing up and down.

_Are those… tears?_

He blinks once and his eyes are clear.

I cough softly, and the boy, whom I presume is Calix, looks at me over Jenny's shoulder. They part quickly, grinning at each other before giving me their full attention.

"Hi, sorry, excuse us for intruding, but your ship crashed into a village, and a Dalek was sort of destroying it, so we figured we'd, you know, check it out." I say, and Jenny scowls.

"The stupid thing followed us for ages, wherever we went. It caught up to us, at the very first New Year's in Times Square, 1904... Must've locked on to a DNA signature or something if it could follow us through the vortex." Jenny says, and I nod, shuffling my feet a little.

_She managed to come up not only with dimension manipulating technology, but also vortex manipulators, on her own. No T.A.R.D.I.S to work with... She must be damn brilliant._

"That's actually something I wanted to ask you about… Who exactly are you?"

"She's my daughter." The Doctor says, and Jenny's eyes snap to his, as if truly noticing his presence for the first time.

My eyes bug out of my head.

"_Daughter?_" I choke, my gaze locking with Calix's, as his is the only appropriately baffled expression in this room. His eyes are even wider than mine.

I can feel the connection of their minds then, the two Time Lords, the clash of excited thoughts and fond memory.

"Dad…?" Jenny says, and the Doctor nods, a disbelieving smile on his face.

"_Dad?_" Calix mutters, his voice high and small.

"Jenny... I thought you couldn't..." The Doctor says, shaking his head.

"I can... and I did. I told you we were the same." She says, and the Doctor covers his smile with his hand before it runs through his hair.

"Similar, too similar, quite right. I thought... Well, you were..." He says quietly, his green eyes somber. Jenny shakes her head, thrusting her arms out and twirling once.

"I was, but I'm here, you know how it works! You changed, too." She says, nodding to him, and he smirks, straightening his bowtie, twisting back and forth.

"Yeah, what do you think? Brand new Doctor." He says, and she laughs, covering her smiling mouth tightly as if she needs to contain the sheer joy or it will cause her to implode.

"Brand new Jenny!" She says, and practically jumps on him, and he laughs loudly, and twirls her around in the happiest hug I think I've ever seen in my life. He rests his head on her spiky red hair, his face happier than I think I've ever seen it, in this form or the last…

_What is going ON?!_

Everyone turns to look at me, and I realize I expressed that sentiment out loud.

_Oops_.

"Right! Evy, this is Jenny, my daughter, and Jenny this is Evy, my… Evy." The Doctor says, waving his hand over me as if presenting a rare and exotic animal. Jenny yanks me into a hug of my own, pulling back to give me a kiss on each cheek.

"Evy!" She says, as if the name on her tongue is the most delightful thing she's ever uttered.

_My god, she's like a ball of sunlight, this little ginger Time Lady._

"Okay, that's great, hi!" I say, letting out a nervous chuckle, "But how?"

_When? With whom? Did I miss something?_

I glance at the Doctor, my grin just as wide as my eyes.

_I feel like it would be important to tell someone you had a relationship with for the past decade._

_"Oh, by the way, I have a fully grown daughter and also I am not the last of my kind, so there's that."_

"That's a great story, I love that story, tell her Dad." Jenny says, and the Doctor lets out a breathy laugh, smoothing his hair back with an apologetic, lopsided grin.

_Yeah that's sounds important to me._

Suddenly the carpeted floor beneath our feet quakes and quivers, and a shrill alarm sounds, red lights blaring from the corners of the room.

"What's happening?" I shout, stumbling as the entire ship jumps beneath me.

"The engines, I should've turned them off once we landed, but I was a bit preoccupied, you know, with dying. They're overloading trying to compensate for the two that have been lost, they're going to blow." Jenny yells, grabbing her companion's hand and heading for the doorway. Calix looks as if he wants to start apologizing again, but then his eyes bug, and he tugs her back.

"The boys! What about the boys? We can't leave them!" He shouts, and she halts, giving him a horrified look before turning on her heel.

"Give us a second!" Jenny says, and they run back through the doorway, towards the control room.

The Doctor and I hesitate, assuming they'll be back in a moment, and finally he meets my eyes. I must still look completely floored, because he gives me an awkward little dancing grin, willing me to be as overjoyed as he is.

"Surprise!" He shouts, his hands shooting towards the ceiling, his fingers wriggling at me.

_Why did you not tell me? I thought we'd gotten over keeping secrets, a long time ago. Or is that not how you and your Evy handled things? Just keep it to ourselves, then?_

I want to say all of that and more, but instead, I just give him a wide smile, gesturing with my own hands to mirror his.

Suddenly an alpaca practically bowls me over, shouldering me into a wall in its hurry to escape the ship.

Apparently alarms mean something to it.

Jenny and Calix come careening from the doorway, each with a little goat in their arms.

"We don't have much time! Go on, Jenny, you first!" Calix shouts, concern for her vivid on his angular face. She runs in front of him, towards the doorway, and suddenly, everyone is gone from the room, goats and all. The Doctor doesn't hesitate for a single second to follow his daughter out into the hallway that leads to the exit.

"But your ship! You've obviously put so much work into it! Years and years, I'd say!" The Doctor shouts from the hall, and I finally get my feet to get moving, running after them.

_Sure, don't worry about me, I'll manage._

The red alarm lights in the hall are blinding, and the sparks are more violent now.

"I can convert another! And with you to help, it'll be a piece of cake!" She shouts back.

I reach the fork in the hall to see them sprinting ahead of me, and the sight allows my feet to really fly.

_Gotta catch up!_

The ship lurches under our feet, and everyone stumbles. I bump into the wall, and my arm connects with it, touching one of the sparks ever so slightly. A burning sensation runs through it, into my very bone and sinew, it seems. I hear Calix let out a cry of pain, a little goat bleat of surprise, and I think the same thing must have happened to him. My eyes sting with the sudden shock, more startling than painful, really.

"Calix! C'mon! Evy, hurry!" I hear Jenny's shout, and I get myself straightened out and running again, seeing that the Doctor has paused, as if realizing that I'm here as well.

He gestures for me to hurry, and as soon as I've gotten past him, he follows behind me, a hand ghosting on the small of my back as we run together. It all feels very familiar, despite the fact that our already screwed up world may have just been turned on its head in the matter of fifteen minutes.

We all burst out of the ship's entrance, and down the ramp. The Kai-ba are watching from their remaining huts, fear in their gigantic eyes as fire starts to spew from the engines under the stabilizers of the ship.

_They don't understand a single bit of what happened or what is happening._

"Everyone run! Run, it's going to explode! Fire! Lots of fire! Follow us!" I shout, and the Kai-ba hesitate, looking at one another as we hurtle from the ship towards the edge of the jungle, where I can see the alpaca standing, prancing nervously, as if wanting more than anything to keep running forever. Yet he's waiting there, for Jenny, I think.

The ground rumbles as the left side of the ship starts to go up in flames, and that sends the Kai-Ba into motion. They yowl and chirp, shouting to their family members to run, scurrying out of their huts after us. They valiantly carry their young and elderly without another moment's hesitation.

We all make it a safe distance away, and together, we watch their village go up in heat and light, a compact explosion taking any semblance of normalcy from this day.

Everything they had known is gone, blasted away in a single moment by something confusing and alien to them.

_I know the feeling..._

I glance at the Doctor, but he's looking at Jenny and her companion, who seem to be checking one another for any wounds.

I tear my gaze away to turn my attention to the people who need my help, the frightened and flabbergasted Kai-ba. They're whimpering and muttering amongst themselves, scurrying to and fro in panic.

This is usually the part where the Doctor does his thing, makes everything okay, shows them it'll get better. Except... He's not doing that.

He's completely fixed upon Jenny, hovering over her and Calix like a curious hummingbird or something.

_Looks like it's up to me, then._

"Everyone, listen to me, I know this is all confusing and scary, but we just need to stay calm and work together. If we do, we can build homes, a new village by the end of tomorrow." I say loud enough for them all to hear me, and they turn their wide faces to me, and instead of the animosity I half expected, they look rather grateful.

After all, we showed up at around the same time that they lost a member of their family, and then their village blew up. I'd probably be a little pissed if I were them, no matter what we did to help...

Yet, I see only trust and relief in their large eyes. A dangerous trait for an entire species to have, to be trusting and open to change.

Yet I'm envious of them for it...

I can't help but sneak another glance over my shoulder, to see that the Doctor is healing the burn on Calix's arm with the sonic, Jenny looking on with concern. The Doctor's eyes connect with mine, probably feeling my gaze, and he nods me over, as if wanting me to join in.

_Come, get to know my daughter, marvel in her existence!_ His emotions scream, all eager and overjoyed, completely ignorant of the pain and devastation of the people before him, the Kai-ba.

_His daughter._

Someone he never mentioned, not even in passing, not even one word. Something he obviously kept to himself for a reason, whatever that reason may be.

_No, I don't belong in that sacred place, all mixed in with a memory he obviously held so very close to his hearts that he couldn't bear to let anyone know._

I shake my head, dropping my eyes to the ground before turning back to those trusting eyes all upon me.

_Yes.. Change is an elusive beast to get a hold of, to grasp and tame._

"Everyone start gathering supplies! I'm going to fetch some tools from... our... hut." I say, turning to where I believe we left the T.A.R.D.I.S.

_But if I can help someone, an entire village, to make change their own... I can do it for myself._

_Right?_

* * *

><p><strong>AN**

**GUYS!**

**Hi.**

**So, whaddya think so far? I'm having a blast writing when I can! It's a good stress reliever, you know :] And Eleven is just too much fun. Still missing my Ten, and let's be honest, I will always miss Ten... But that's what makes writing Evy so natural. Evy will always be connected to Ten. She lived a good chunk of her life with Ten...**

**Change is hard to get used to, as we all know. Whovians have to do it once every few years, to get used to a new face as the man we all know and love. New personality, new reactions, new everything. **

**I honestly think Whovians learn things from Doctor Who that are important and relevant to life in the past, present, and future. Don't you agree?**

**We're so aweome. Lol**

**Okay, so I love you guys. Please, pretty please, let me know what you think! Reviews are so nice, and make my life just that bit brighter, you know :D**

**Hooray!**

**Lots of love,**

**-A.**


	4. Short Hair

The glow of the moons in the sky lights my way through the trees, in addition to the torch I have clutched in my hand. A crude little hand-axe hanging from my belt-loop bumps the side of my thigh, hitting a bruise from when I'd tripped on a plank of wood, bumped into one of the spikes for the perimeter fence…

It's been a very long 30 hours of work, and I just need to get away from everything. My palms are covered in scratches and splinters, my back feels like it's about to snap, and my feet…

Well, let's just say I wish I didn't have them.

_A long day, yes… But a rewarding one._

The others are back in the new village we'd helped build, a mere mile from the previous one, now a crater in this planet's crust. The Kai-ba held a funeral banquet for the little boy, really just some fruit and a few unlucky animals they managed to hunt down last minute.

One of them, an elder named Teyrani, had told me in their halted, stuttering tongue that if they don't have a funeral banquet to send him off, the boy's soul will not be able to join his ancestors in Zok-ra. It's their version of heaven and the consequence of not getting in is being doomed to roam this worldly sphere as a malevolent spirit, tainted by his family's betrayal forever more.

His name was Pa-ruk, and he had only lived for 9 years.

I can't stop thinking of that little body being brought out to us, the looks on his family members' faces... Gazing at us as if we were gods, so hopeful that we might use our power to resurrect him.

_If we had gotten there just a few minutes earlier…_

And the Doctor's rage making him deaf to my pleas, to reason, toying with that Dalek. If I'm being honest, it was frightening and it hurt me, to know that I can no longer get through to him when he gets like that, when he becomes the manifestation of his demons.

We used to be each others' anchors… The first line of defense against ourselves. If I got too drunk on the power of manipulation, on the abilities I'd been cursed with, he'd gently pull me back to sanity, back to myself. For him, I'd do the same, remind him that he's not only a Time Lord, but a man, and a good one at that.

_Now, though… Now… He's a stranger. He thinks he knows me, and I think I know him, but this is just a reminder that it's all a lie. _

I let out a frustrated sigh, running a sore hand through my tangled hair.

_Sooner or later, you're going to have to accept that you're stuck here, Evy. You're in this universe, he's the only Doctor you've got, regenerated and transdimensional or not, and there's nothing you can do about it._

I reach the edge of the trees, where I can see the T.A.R.D.I.S sitting about a half mile down the stretch of sandy beach. There are waves in the water now, no longer a looking-glass of still ocean, and the dull roar of them lulls me into a false sense of contentment. I fall to my knees in the sand and go to work plucking splinters out of my hands and arms, relieved to be off my feet. The torch sputters out of life in the sand, but I can see just fine.

The moons are much brighter on this planet, the light of them more gold than silver like Earth's moon. It reminds me of Fanriay, a planet where the currency was made of stone, and the buildings were made of solid gold. Stone was rare, a commodity to be treasured, while gold could be plucked out of the ground practically anywhere. It was like a gemstone to them, and the rich coveted plain rock more greedily than us humans covet diamonds.

I remember the Doctor giving me a gold circlet to wear after the festival, one he'd found abandoned in a waste-basket.

* * *

><p><em>"Nah! It's fine, it's perfectly sanitary! They don't even have hair, you can't get lice from a species that doesn't host lice!" The Doctor says, a crooked grin on his face as he gently places the intricate gold head-piece on me. It's much heavier than it looks, and I slip my hand out of his to reach up to adjust it to fit a little better.<em>

_"Still, you just plucked it out of the trash? Who knows why they threw it away!" I say, but then I slow my pace when we pass a shop window, and I can see myself. My dark curly hair looks funny with the heavy circlet weighing it down. I look like a mushroom._

_"Oh, wow. I'm breath-taking!" I say, my voice thick with sarcasm, before chuckling and reaching up to remove the silly thing. I place it on the steps leading to the shop._

_Someone will probably think I'm littering…_

_"But you are." The Doctor says, a smile in his words, and when I glance at him, he's giving me that look. Melted amber eyes, one corner of his mouth tilted up in a smile._

_"Oh, stop it. I think you're a bit biased." I say with a grin, taking his hand again, and he pulls me gently towards him, pressing his forehead to mine._

_A few of the hairless, earless people pass us on the gold sidewalk, but they pay us no mind. It has always amazed me, how little people pay attention to us on our adventures. No matter how strange we look to them, they never seem to mind, never seem to discriminate much._

_Maybe that's a strictly human trait?_

_One of the Doctor's hands picks up a curl as he often does, twirling it in his fingers, his eyes fixed upon it as if fascinated._

_"Maybe you're the one who's biased…" He mutters, "I love your long hair, you know. It curls in a new way every single day, does what it wants to… Always so soft and strong, no matter what it goes through. Like you."_

_Impossibly, even after so long together, blood rises to my cheeks at the accolade. It's rare that he compliments me like this, no playfulness, no layered sarcasm._

_His smile widens when he sees the blush, and I just laugh, snaking my arms around his neck to hug him._

* * *

><p>I don't really realize that I've even stood up until I feel the water seep through my shoes, cooling my throbbing feet.<p>

_I miss you…_

I bend down to wrench them off my feet and toss them over my shoulder, reveling in the feel of the cool sand and water rushing through my strained toes. One hand reaches up to stroke the length of my hair, a gesture I've always found comforting. It's nearly to my waist now.

Ever since he'd said that, I'd been hard pressed to cut it. He liked it long, I liked it long, it worked out nicely.

_But you're gone in this universe, and my universe… Well, it never really existed now. Everything we did, everything we shared, everything we were lives only in me now. _

_And it's time to truly accept that._

I grab the stone axe at my side and lift it from my belt loop, gathering my loose curls into a ponytail at my neck.

_I can't survive lingering like this, wishing I'd disappeared with you. What's done is done, I'm here, and even though I will always love you with all my hearts, every inch of my being… _

I bring the sharp edge of the stone to the base of the ponytail, my eyes fixing upon the gold-tinted moons.

_I can't do it. I can't dwell on the macabre dream of being with you once more._

_Because the truth of the matter is I'm here, whether I want it or not. I'm alive, and there's a new Doctor here, whether he needs me or not._

I wince at the sound of my hair cutting on the jagged sharpness of the axe as I press it upwards. With a few sawing motions, the remaining hair falls forward to frame my face, the ends tickling my chin. I let out a breath, holding the ponytail of severed hair up to the moonlight.

A solid 10 inches of hair, my hair, a part of me separated. It seems appropriate though.

_Fresh and new. The beginning of something._

I allow my grasp to loosen, and my hair drops into the ocean at my feet, immediately carried away from me.

"Evy? There you are!" I hear a voice, and when I turn, it's Jenny, carrying a torch of her own through the trees, "You missed the dance they did for Pa-ruk. It was pretty powerful, you would've liked it, I think."

"Oh, yeah, that's a shame, I… was just on my way to grab something from… the T.A.R.D.I.S." I say lamely, and she watches me with those amber eyes, her father's eyes, from before all of this happened.

"No you weren't." She says simply.

I put the stone axe back through a belt loop and let out a sigh.

"Yeah okay, I wasn't. I just wanted a moment." I say, shrugging and wading through the waves back to the dry sand. I plop down next to my discarded shoes and dead torch, bringing my knees up to my chest. I trace a pattern the Doctor had taught me once, the symbol for Gallifrey, their insignia, in the sand.

"I like your hair." She says, and I let out a chuckle.

"Thanks."

Jenny hesitates before striding over to plop down next to me. Her borrowed clothes, my clothes, or alternate Evy's clothes, or whoever-strikes-your-fancy's clothes, are baggy on her, she's so very petite and slender. Her brand new red hair looks to be ablaze in the gold light. She doesn't say anything, which I really appreciate. It's something the Doctor would have done for me, allowing me to take my comfort for myself instead of handing it to me.

"Have you… ever felt like you don't belong? Like no matter where you go, who you find, what you see, you'll never feel completely happy again?" I say finally, my fingers stilling in the sand, and she looks down at the insignia.

"I think I have. After Dad disappeared, I was so excited to travel, do all the things he told me a Time Lord could do. But it only took a few days to realize that it wasn't all it's cracked up to be. Without Dad, there was no one but me, no one to talk to or hug or hold my hand." She says, nodding slowly before a lazy smile spreads on her lips, "I had a few friends in the beginning, but they all became frightened or homesick, and I was alone again... Until Calix, that is. He wasn't afraid of me, of what I could do. He made me feel like maybe I wasn't as alone as I thought I was."

"That's how we were, your… Dad and I." I say, smiling despite myself.

"Were? Was it because he regenerated?"

"Well- It's complicated." I say shortly, and she drops her gaze from me to the insignia in the sand again.

"What does it mean?" She says after a long moment, and I look at her in surprise, wondering if she's making a strange, unfunny joke.

Her wide eyes hold no hint of that.

"Well, it's your symbol. Gallifrey's symbol, I mean. You know, your insignia, sort of like a family crest, only for the whole lot of you." I say, and she tilts her head, looking at the symbol with sudden interest. She reaches down to trace it with her own slender finger.

_Why doesn't she know?_

"Have you never… Were you not born on Gallifrey?" I say, and she shakes her head.

"I was born on Messaline, from a progenation machine. Barely even heard anything of Gallifrey." She says casually, and I try to keep my face from showing my shock.

_A progenation what-now?_

"Right, yeah. A progenation machine." I say, nodding my head, "What's that again?"

Jenny lets out a giggle.

"It extrapolates DNA from a single source to create a new combination of genetic information, thus a brand new, fully formed organism." She says, and I nod.

"So, it was just him. You're basically all… Doctor DNA. " I say, and she shrugs.

"Pretty much. But I'm two times the daughter he expected." She says with a grin, and I can't help but grin back.

"Bet he was real surprised." I say.

"Oh, Evy, you should've seen him. All gruff and grumpy, the big old teddy bear. Only took him an hour to crack and get all dad-like," She says and I laugh, imagining the Doctor trying to ignore his paternal instinct and failing miserably, "And when he thought I was dying… I think his hearts broke a little. I know mine did, when I came to and he was gone."

"He thought you died?" I say, my brows rising in sudden understanding.

_That's why you never spoke about Jenny. Why bring up such a painful memory, losing this little ball of sunshine so soon after getting to know her…_

_Oh, Doctor… What other scars did you hide from me? How many wounds were you nursing in secret?_

"Yeah, I got shot and it took a while for me to get the hang of regeneration. By the time he did, he and his friend were gone. After that, I left Messaline and never looked back, been traveling ever since. 50-ish years in my timeline..." She says with a thoughtful look on her face, and I nod, lifting my eyes to the moons once more.

"So Calix is a recent development then…" I say, and she smiles.

"Relatively recent, yeah. He's been hanging around for about two years, almost three."

I nudge her with my elbow, giving her a wink when she glances my way.

"And are you just mates? Or…?"

"Or." She says with a smile brighter than the stars, a little giggle escaping her.

"That's great, Jenny! He's handsome, and even I can tell he really cares about you. You should've seen the look on his face, fawning over you after your regeneration." I say and she sighs, nodding happily.

"Calix is my very best friend, and all I could ever ask for in a companion…" She says with a giddy smile, then becomes very serious in under a second, her eyes locking with mine, "And… I think I love him."

A beat of silence passe between us before I laugh, running a hand through my hair. It feels so strange, having it be so short.

"How about we let your Dad get used to him before you throw that out there." I say, standing up to dust the sand off me and holding my hand out to her, "C'mon, let's go get the boys. I might pass out if we don't get some rest soon."

* * *

><p>"Jenny, your room will be somewhere in this general direction," the Doctor says, waving an arm to the doorway on the second level of the console room, "And you…"<p>

The Doctor gives Calix an appraising look, straightening his bowtie.

"The T.A.R.D.I.S knows where to put you." He says, earning an uncertain smile from Calix.

"Knows where to put me? What's that supposed to mean?" I hear Calix mutter to Jenny as the Doctor turns his attention to me, his green eyes searching mine.

"You alright?" He says, his velveteen voice soft. I shrug.

"Yeah, course I am, why wouldn't I be? This is fantastic, I mean, she's your daughter! It's grovely. Lovely, great, I meant to say one or the other…" I prattle, and he presses his lips together against a smile.

"I meant your arm, looks like it hurts." He says, and I follow his gaze to my right arm, where admittedly now that he mentions it, does hurt a bit. The burn from those exposed wires isn't too bad, really. Just a bit red, a few blisters.

I've had worse.

"Oh, right… No, I'm fine, I'll just put some of that Lathanth Oil lotion stuff on it before bed." I say, cradling the arm against my chest, and he nods, rocking back on his heels. Silence lingers.

I see Jenny waving her arms behind the Doctor, puckering her lips and pretending to smooch someone, but I ignore her. Calix stifles a laugh, pressing a hand over his lips before they part to make their way to their respective rooms.

"So, I uh... I'm exhausted. I'm going to hit the hay, the dusty trail, the sack." I say, stretching my sore arms over my head, and starting to turn towards the resident bedroom wing.

"Evy, wait." He says, and his hand grasps mine. I allow him to hold it, and turn to look at him. My cheeks redden at the close proximity, my stomach turning a little when he just stares at me and doesn't say anything.

"Yeah, Doctor?" I finally say, my voice uncertain, and he clears his throat, his hand tightening around mine.

"Did you happen to realize that you are amazing?" He says finally, and I chuckle, my gaze dropping from his to my shoes, still soggy from their dip in the ocean.

"Well now that you mention it." I say sarcastically.

"I mean it. I know I'm not what you want, or expected. You'd never choose this, choose me... and yet here you are, holding my hand." He says with a tiny smile, looking down at our interlocked fingers.

I swallow thickly, words not forming on my tongue for a long moment.

"How could I not?" I say, and his green eyes soften and crinkle at the edges. I tug on his hand and we fall into an easy hug.

He holds me silently for a few moments, and I can feel his quickened four-beat pulse against my skin.

"By the way, nice hair, very rogue." He says, his smooth cheek moving next to mine, and I chuckle, pulling back to give him a quick kiss. Just a peck on the cheek, yet his eyes widen, his hand twitching up to touch where my lips had been.

It's so strange, how different he is, how child-like and new.

"Thanks, I'm glad you like it... Night, Doctor." I say softly, before making my way up the metal stairs to my bedroom, intending to take the quickest shower known to man before passing out on those lovely Rownish sheets.

_This day... It feels like an important day. One of those many days I'll never forget. Jenny, Calix, the Kai-ba... The Doctor, all of us working together, all of us working towards creating positive change in the world._

_I'll always remember it in perfect detail, like an engraving carved into precious metal. _

_The first very good memory I've had in this universe._

_And I wouldn't change a minute of it._

* * *

><p><strong>AN**

**Hi guys. Long time no see... or write, or read... Or whichever.**

**Missed you all, hope you enjoyed this. I loved writing it, I love all this new stuff to work with. I love Jenny as a character and what she means to the Doctor, and now, to Evy... Maybe sunspot Jenny is just what the they need :] a little light in their lives after all this darkness.**

** Super tired from school. This is the point in the semester where every professor decides to put us through hell, then drag us back to life, and send us back down to hell over and over, like... Every day.**

**So... I'm exhausted, but enjoying it! Can't wait to see where we go from here!**

**Lots of love,**

**-A.**


	5. Clash of the Phobias

I take a sip of coffee, flipping the page of a book I'd found under alternate Evy's old bed. I'd been sort of delighted to know that the T.A.R.D.I.S let me find it this morning. She's still cross with me, as evidenced from the suddenly bright flashing lights all around my ceiling in the dead of night, so when I found it, I took it as a bit of an apology. It's called _A Brief Guide to the Universe's Shiga Toxins._ It's moderately interesting, or at least the pictures of bacteria and tissues and such are. Jenny sits across from me at the shiny metal table, arms crossed, tapping her foot so rapidly, I wonder if she's going to pop a vein.

"Careful, you don't want to take off into deep space without us, there." I say, taking another sip of coffee, and she stops tapping, letting out a sigh. She ruffles her pixie-short red hair, somehow making it look even better.

_A talent she's acquired from her dad, I think._

I shut down the memories of rumpled chocolate hair before they can even begin.

"Where is Calix? He's taking forever. He's an early bird, he never sleeps in this late, and I want to get going! There's so much we could do!" Jenny says, and I shrug.

"He'll be up soon, I'm sure." I say, and right as I flip the next page, lo and behold, Calix comes through a doorway that had appeared from the back of the room. I slowly shut the book, and take in his… peculiar state of appearance.

"Calix, you look terrible." Jenny says, and he lets out a huff, rubbing his eyes and picking a piece of straw from his dark hair, "Like… Really terrible."

"Oh, that's just the absolute cherry on top after the night I've had. Thank you, Jenny." He says bitterly, running a hand over his dark hair, plucking the straw out, "This ship is a nightmare!"

"Wait, what? Why? I think she's amazing!" Jenny says, and he lets out a single, loud laugh.

"The ship! This thing," He says, gesturing to the floor, then to the ceiling, "It has it out for me. Every time I went through a doorway, it just… It was the same thing over and over. Like a broken record!"

"Which room did she loop you into?" I ask, bringing the coffee to my lips.

"The stable, with the boys!"

I snort a little, spitting back into my mug, because I know exactly why the T.A.R.D.I.S. was doing that.

"Yeah so funny, you try sleeping in the hay with an agitated pair of pygmy goats and a grumpy alpaca. I was trapped like… Like…" He sputters, then lets out a defeated sigh when he sees our amusement.

_Me thinks her Time Lord is suspicious of his daughter's friend._

"Like a rat?" I say, wiping the coffee off my chin, and Jenny clears her throat to hide her laughter.

"Oh, I wouldn't say a rat! That sounds more… buggy, like a fly, or an ant. Fragile things, insects. Easily taken care of…" I hear the Doctor's voice from the doorway leading to the console room. It's light and joking, but something tells me that's not what he's going for.

_Oh, please, not the overbearing-daddy-dearest act. You've got to be kidding me._

I see Calix's eyes narrow ever so slightly, his expression hardened.

I feel the Doctor stand behind me, and then his hands are on my shoulders, his cheek next to mine, seemingly snooping on my choice of reading. I try to keep my mind from reacting too strongly to his touch.

_I don't want you to know just yet._

_How much power you could have over me, that is…_

"The T.A.R.D.I.S didn't mean anything by it, I'm sure, though. Right, Evy?" He says, giving my tense shoulders a light squeeze.

"Yeah, _she_ just gets… overprotective sometimes. Makes her act like a complete moron." I say pointedly, bringing the mug to my lips to take another sip before I see my own spit hovering on the surface.

_Right… Eww…_

"Why do you all keep talking about this ship like it's a person? It's creepy…" Calix says, sidling into the seat next to Jenny. The Doctor releases me from his gentle grasp and sits next to me, giving me a wink so quick and subtle, I have to watch his face for a sign it really happened.

_You are ridiculous. Playing pranks on a man 1/900th your age, like an overzealous toddler…_

"Because she practically is. She's sentient, the T.A.R.D.I.S is. Our caretaker, our home, our provider. She's one of my best friends… Or, she was when…" I say, trailing off into a mutter, letting my gaze drop from the Doctor's, "Anyway the point is, you treat her like a person, got it? She just communicates differently, that's all."

"Got it… I just didn't know a ship could be sentient! That a Time Lord thing?" Calix says, and the Doctor scoffs.

"Well it's not a human thing, I can tell you that. Wouldn't expect the likes of you to understand."

Calix opens his mouth to say something, eyes locked on the Doctor, but apparently decides otherwise, fiddling his thumbs agitatedly. His tired gaze holds more than a hint of anger.

The Doctor smirks, leaning back in his chair and propping his feet up on the table, seeming pleased at Calix's silence; A tiny battle he's won against this unworthy suitor to his daughter.

I give him a disapproving sidelong glance, frowning.

_I swear… If I have to sit through this much longer, I think I'll choke on the 'macho' in the air._

"Yes, it's a Time Lord thing. Bigger on the inside, sentient, all of that junk." I say, smacking the tops of his lace up boots, and he begrudgingly slides them back onto the floor where they belong.

"Dad?" Jenny says after a strange moment of silence across the table.

"Hmm?"

She blinks a few times, taking a deep breath.

"I just… I can't help but notice you don't seem to… Well, you're not acting very welcoming towards Calix." She says, her delicate eyebrows knitting together in frustration.

"Not true, I gave him his very own customized bedroom and everything!" He says, keeping his face completely straight, blank of the amusement I can feel oozing between the cracks in my mental walls.

"She's not an idiot, love." I mutter, fiddling with my hair when I realize what I've called him.

He doesn't seem fazed in the slightest.

"I'm just looking out for you. I don't know him, he could be one of the Slitheen, or a very believable hologram, or-"

"I would never hurt Jenny, if that's what you're implying!" Calix says, standing up from his chair, and the Doctor does the same, leering aggressively over the table towards the poor boy.

"I don't _know_ that! All the things I've seen over the years, if there's one thing I've learned, it's to never trust the ones you love with strangers." He growls, and Jenny stands up, leaving me as the last sane one in the room. I swallow nervously, all the excited, feverish emotion brushing up against my mind enough to make me want to run a marathon.

_Note to self: One angry Time Lord, I can handle. Two? _

_Maybe a little much._

"I know him, though! I know him, and I think I'm intelligent enough to pick someone at least trustworthy, thank you!" Jenny says furiously, her face becoming a shade of red to rival her hair, "And who are you to tell me who I can be with, anyway?"

"I'm your dad, that's who, and it's my responsibility to make sure you're safe!" The Doctor says, and I sink down into my chair as my feeble little walls struggle to hold out the mental shouting match they seem to be having.

_How did this turn from a quiet breakfast with a book into an alien screamfest?_

"And where have you been the last 50 years? Hmm? Where were you when I first changed bodies? Where were you when I was confused and alone and lost?" Jenny shouts, and I cringe as a few of her thoughts leak through into my mind, images of bright regeneration light, screeching metal, and the beeping of a crashing ship.

The memory tastes like fear and solitude.

"I didn't know-"

"Exactly, and you still don't know! You're just so afraid to let people in, so afraid that you refused to believe in me! All you had to do was wait, but you left me on that planet because you didn't want to believe I could be like you! You were a coward who didn't know, and you still are!" Jenny shouts, gesturing in exasperation to me, and I slouch, wishing she'd leave me out of this.

_Okay, so the family problems run deeper than I thought…_

Suddenly the cloister bell begins ringing.

"What's that?" Calix pipes up, and I get to my feet, glad to be given an excuse to leave. Brushing past a rather stricken Doctor, frozen in place, I rush into the console room, planting myself in front of the diagnostic panel, but…

My hands flutter uselessly over the brand new buttons and levers.

_I have no idea how to work you anymore, old girl…_

I grasp the monitor and bring it around to face me.

I can hear the Doctor's voice still coming from the kitchen, with Jenny fuming over him.

_Honestly, Calix seems harmless to me! What's his problem?_

_I wonder…_

_You know what? No. I need to focus on whatever this issue is with the T.A.R.D.I.S._

"Uhh… Interactive Vocal Command… 72?" I say uncertainly, and instead of a diagnostic report, a movie begins to play on the monitor. Two knights are fighting.

_"_Tis but a scratch!"

"A scratch? Your arm's off!"

I can't help the incredulous laugh that escapes me.

_Really, was Monty Python important enough to program as a vocal command?_

"Okay, different one, different one, let's try… Interactive Vocal Command 27!"

Thankfully, the two knights disappear, and the diagnostic report shows up on the screen. I don't understand all of it, but the points I can understand tell me that we're in for a bit of a wild ride.

The time rotor and vortex thrusters have started up on their own.

I let out a weary sigh.

"Everyone, you'd best shut up and hold on to something!" I shout, and the squabbling from the kitchen stops.

The Doctor only has time to walk through the doorway into the console room before it lurches around us.

"What did you do?!" He shouts, latching onto the railing and holding on for dear life. I tumble backwards from the console, towards the stairs leading to the first floor level of the room.

_Well, shit._

My hands grasp in front of me uselessly for anything to hold on to, but it's all in vain. I tumble backwards down the stairs, rolling and bumping my head against the stairs a few times before coming to a stop at the bottom of the short little staircase. I remain curled up on the humming metal floor until the T.A.R.D.I.S has finished her temper tantrum, or whatever this is.

"Evy! You alright?" The Doctor calls, and I hear his footsteps across the metal above me. I rub my head, groaning in response.

"Good. Jenny?"

"Fine." I hear her curt voice.

"What was that?" Calix asks, and I lift my head, peering through my hair up towards the console.

"She took her own course of action, for whatever reason. I couldn't stop her, I don't know how to do anything on the new console…" I say, getting to my feet and fixing my rumpled clothes.

"Why, though? It's extremely rare, especially with an older model, for a T.A.R.D.I.S to fly itself." The Doctor says, and I drag myself back up the stairs to stand behind him as he flurries about the console.

"Is it? She's always seemed independent enough to me…" I mutter, stretching my now sore body.

"Fly itself? Where are we, then?" Calix says, but the Doctor ignores him. Jenny glowers at her father, taking Calix's hand and heading for the doors.

"We'll just find out ourselves." She says, and I take a step towards the doors as well, only to hesitate, turning to glance at the Doctor.

He's hidden from my view, on the other side of the time rotor.

"You two be careful, okay? Try not to wander too far, we'll catch up in a moment!" I say, and once it's just us in the console room, I hug my arms to myself, make my way around the console to him.

He's bent over the buttons and levers before him, knuckles white on the edge.

"Hey…" I say, sidling up near him and leaning on the console. His green eyes dart to mine for a moment, vulnerable and fragile, then back to glaring at the console.

"She's right, you know." He says, a bitter smile forcing itself onto his lips, "About everything."

I let my mind's walls down just a bit, tendrils of myself reaching for him hesitantly. His consciousness is deceptively calm, instead of the passionate roiling and tumultuous self-loathing I'd have expected. He eagerly accepts my mind's embrace, and I sense that he's relieved I stayed to speak with him.

It makes me feel a little guilty, how thankful he is for something that would have simply been expected in the past…

"Of course she is, she's your daughter," I say lightly, but when he doesn't respond, I coax his hand to loosen its death grip on the console, bringing it up to hold in both of my own, "I can't say I agree with the whole coward thing, but I do understand that you're afraid…"

He remains silent, watching my fingers play and intertwine with his, just as I used to do in another life.

"Yesterday, I drew the Gallifreyan crest in the sand, and she had no idea what it was… Maybe if she understood why, if you told her more about Gallifrey, about your life, she'd understand why you couldn't believe… Why it's hard for you to trust, and love... Letting people in is a gamble with you, but with good reason. She should know." I say, gently replacing his hand on the console.

"She doesn't need that weighing on her. To know her father is… well, you know." He says haltingly, frowning deeply, and I vaguely feel shame lace through his thoughts.

"Maybe she does though. She's not strictly just your daughter, you know. She's a Time Lady, and I think she's strong enough to know the truth. How can you expect her to get over this feeling of abandonment without understanding you? Without understanding where the two of you came from…"

"No, she's too young… You don't understand the instinct to shield them from anything harmful, even the truth. You'll never be a parent so-" He says, stopping himself just a little too late, and I close my eyes against that old scar, throbbing a little painfully.

"Yeah, I won't be, but that doesn't mean I don't understand the instinct… Just think about it, alright? She has to understand you and you have to understand her if you want her to stick around. Otherwise, she'll always resent you…" I say, turning away before another thought comes to my lips.

"And hey... Be nice to that boy. He's important to her. He was there when she needed someone, and if that isn't enough for you…" I say, leaving the rest as food for thought as I head for the doors.

"When did you get wise on me, Crenshaw?" He calls, and I scoff, shrugging before I get to the doors.

"Please, I've always been the wise one, I think we both know that."

I step outside, closing the doors behind me, resting my head with closed eyes on the doors for a moment. It takes effort to rebuild the little breach in my walls, and I almost feel as though I don't want to.

_But no. I can't do that, not yet. I can't trust my very soul with someone that I don't even know loves me anymore._

_That would be asking for a world of pain, now wouldn't it?_

I turn around to open my eyes and promptly have a heart attack.

My boots sit upon water, standing as if it were solid ground. I can see Jenny and Calix off in the endless distance, hand in hand... On the water?

_ I'm going to drown any second, sink into that deep, blue abyss below._

An image of thick, black tentacles rising to drag me towards an inky, watery grave forces itself to the forefront of my mind. A memory of alternate Evy's, that I remember seeing in her timeline when the universe was ripped apart, when my life was turned on its head.

Even though I know _logically_ that I can't be standing on water, and I know _logically_ that there's no gigantic Kraken-octopus-squid creature trying to eat me right now…

Panic grips my throat in an iron vise, and I press my body against the doors, fumbling with the key around my neck. My free hand smacks against the doors over and over, and I don't realize I'm calling for the Doctor until the doors swing open and he's there.

I fling myself inside, clutching at the Doctor's body as a drowning person might, my instincts already having set the appropriate action into motion. I'm practically climbing him at this point.

"Whoa, hey, hey, slow down, watch the bowtie, it's fragile!" He exclaims quickly, but his arms grasp me securely, and I can breathe again.

I bury my face into the crook of his neck to anchor myself, and get this trembling under control. One of his hands holds my back, the other secured behind my head, buried in my now short hair.

"What happened? Jenny, where's-" He halts, though, and I feel him relax, "Oh, right, right."

His embrace tightens, his hand stroking my hair.

"It's alright, we can get Jenny and Calix and just get out of here." He says, and I pull away to look up at him, confusion starting to muddle my head.

"What just happened to me?" I squeak, and he raises a brow.

"You're terrified of being out in deep water, you've got a phobia of it. Isn't that what happened?" He says, as if I've gone looney.

_Um… Is it?_

"No, I don't have a phobia of water, since when do I have a phobia of water?" I say, angling myself so I can see out the doors, and then I begin to question myself, as the sight of the open ocean sends shivers of terror up my spine.

_What could be below the surface? What could be waiting for me?_

_Oh, why would the T.A.R.D.I.S bring us to such a horrifying place on purpose?!_

Jenny and Calix run into view, looking quite alarmed.

"Is she alright? What happened?" Calix calls, and they begin to run toward us, back to the T.A.R.D.I.S… Across the water?

_You know, I'm no physicist, but I had always been pretty sure that liquid water has never been a good surface for running, or walking, or… anything but swimming, really. Floating, sure, but running?_

"She's fine, it's the open water, she's been terrified for years! Isn't that such a relief?" He says, and for some reason, in his voice, there's a note of… triumph? Happiness?

I look up at him, and… Yes, there's happiness there in his green eyes.

"I'm not afraid of open water, I've never been afraid of anything but spiders! I don't understand…" I say, stepping back from him, annoyance rearing its ugly head.

Yet… I can't quite make myself look at the vastness of it, waiting to swallow us up, feed us to its many hungry creatures…

"Yes you are, ever since we went to Hache! Oh, that was years ago! Six years, don't you remember? You're remembering, aren't you?" He says, suddenly very close again, his finger tapping on the side of my head as if that will jar my memory.

"No, stop it!" I say, swatting his hand away, "I've never been to a planet called Hache… Right?"

"Yes you have, I almost lost you that day, and that night… Well… Let's just say I found you." He says, straightening his bowtie, his eyebrows waggling, and his cheeks reddening almost imperceptibly.

_No, but that happened after I fell down that ravine, and he'd thought I'd been eaten by the… slithery snake people?_

_Right?_

I search my memories, trying to discern between what the tear in the universe showed me, and what is true in this timeline. My timeline… Not hers, or any other Evy I'd seen, just mine.

_I remember the sickly green of the special swimming suits we dressed in, unaware of the horror below us. _

_I remember losing consciousness as my lungs screamed for oxygen, clawing at the slippery tentacles wrapped around my legs. _

_I remember the feel of his lips on mine, coughing up the water in my lungs before he held me, his body shaking with silent sobs of shock and relief._

"No!" I say, shaking my head adamantly, "That wasn't me. I thought you said this wouldn't be a problem, that the tear in the universe was fixed."

"It is fixed! You're just the metaphorical thread I used to sew it up, so… Ah… There's bound to be a few glitches."

"Glitches?!"

"Tear in the universe?!" Jenny asks, but we don't have time to elaborate.

Suddenly a crackling noise whips through the air, and the water that had been solid beneath Calix's feet disappears. I can hear his shouts of surprise echo, as if he's falling very far indeed.

_This water doesn't act like water at all. What is it? What's happening?_

"Calix!" Jenny shouts, crouching to look into where he'd fallen, but the Doctor grabs her, practically yanking her onto the T.A.R.D.I.S.

"LET GO OF ME! I can't lose him, please, he's all I have." She whimpers, fighting him to get back out of the T.A.R.D.I.S, "I love him, please, I have to go after him!"

The Doctor freezes at that, watching tears of fury and fear well up in his daughter's amber eyes. He glances at me, his green gaze holding mine intensely for just a moment.

I almost regret keeping my walls up, because normally, I feel as though he'd be telling me something important…

_Maybe I should…_

Then he kisses Jenny's forehead quickly and strides out of the T.A.R.D.I.S, hesitating for just a second before crossing his hands over his chest, and leaping into the hole in the water.

"Geronimo!"

The sound of his voice echoes just like Calix's, trailing off into shouts of enthrallment, like a child on a roller coaster, before silence follows.

I blink in shock.

"Doctor?" I say, as if he might pop his head out of that hole in the water, and answer.

"Evy, c'mon, we have to go after them!" Jenny says, tugging on my hand, but my feet are firmly planted in the safety of the T.A.R.D.I.S.

By a fear that isn't even mine.

By water that isn't even water.

"Evy!" Jenny says, exasperation in her voice, before she scoffs and lets go of my hand. She walks out onto the water, but before she can reach the hole in the water, a new one opens up beneath her.

And with a squeal of surprise, she's gone too.

And I'm alone.


End file.
